In the Woods When First We Met

21. Mask

As Anne stepped into the house, she took a deep breath. Be normal, she said silently to herself, Just be normal. Everything will be fine.

She stopped and took a look at herself before walking into the kitchen. Nothing looked out place on her dress. There was a little dirt on it, but that could be explained away, if needed, by saying it had happened when she had fallen over the root that caused her to sprain her wrist.

No, she quickly realized. The dirt's on the back of my dress, not the front. I...I fell backwards...while playing...at recess.

Anne's stockings had dirt on them too, but hopefully Marilla wouldn't notice. Anyway, Anne would wash them quickly.

She stepped into the kitchen and saw Marilla cutting up potatoes.

"Hi," Anne said quietly.

Marilla turned toward her, startled.

"Gracious, Anne. You snuck up on me! I'm not used to you slipping in so quietly. Have you finally learned how to come into a house without bursting in and letting the door slam shut behind you?"

"I couldn't," Anne said, lifting her arm just a bit.

Marilla made a face, coming over and looking at her arm. "All right, tell me what happened."

Anne took a breath before she said, almost robotically, "I was walking to school and I tripped over a root. I fell down and hurt my wrist. A boy who was walking to school gave me his scarf so I could wrap it up. I'm fine now."

Having finished her rehearsed speech, she looked up at Marilla.

Marilla looked unhappy. "Well, I've cut up potatoes and I was going to have you start mashing them, but I suppose I'll have to do it myself."

"I'm sorry," Anne said, feeling very much in the way.

"It's all right," Marilla said, a tad more gently this time, "It isn't as if you meant to do it. But I suppose you weren't watching where you were going, were you? You're always lost in a daydream. Perhaps this will teach you to stop dreaming and pay attention to what's around you."

Anne nodded, hoping that was the end of it and Marilla would let it drop.

She did.

She went back to her bowl and began mashing the potatoes herself.

"Is there anything I can do?" Anne asked, feeling rather unwanted.

"Fetch me the milk and butter, please. Oh, and the salt."

Anne set down her bookstrap and lunch basket on the table.

"Well hang up your hat and shawl before you start helping me," Marilla said, as if Anne should have known better.

"Right," Anne said, going to take them off and hang them on the coat rack near the front door.

Before going back into the kitchen, she paused in the entryway and took a few unsteady breaths. Why was she having such a bad feeling just from talking to Marilla about dinner? Marilla was not exactly a warm fuzzy person, hardly what Anne would call maternal, but she wasn't mean to her, not really. So what was wrong?

Anne tried to push down her feelings and marched back in.

As Anne helped Marilla with dinner- as much as she was able, without using her other arm- she didn't say one word.

Finally Marilla said, "What's gotten into you? You're such a chatterbox."

Anne shrugged and put the salt away after Marilla had added it to the mashed potatoes.

"Don't misunderstand me, I enjoy having some solitude, but are you unwell?"

Anne whispered, "No. I'm all right."

Sigh.

I better perk up a little, Anne thought, she's sure to suspect something. I'm never this quiet. Mrs. Hammond used to say my tongue was hinged in the middle. And she was right. I'm never this quiet. But what can I talk about?

"What did you learn at school today?" Marilla asked.

Anne blanked out for a moment.

What could she say?

"Um...I..." Anne bit her lip. "We...we did a lot of..."

"Come to the point, Anne."

"Long division," Anne finally came up with.

"Oh? And how you finding it?" Marilla asked.

"I understand it," Anne said, "But even the little ones are ahead of me."

"Well, that's understandable," Marilla answered. "They've all been at school and you haven't."

"I've been at school! I was in school all day!" Anne put in quickly.

Marilla looked at her funny. "Yes, I know you went to school," she said. "I meant that the other children haven't had any interruption in their schooling, and you have. I'm sure you'll pick it up in no time at all."

Anne let go of a deep breath.

Marilla went to the breadbox and took out a loaf.

"Anne, is something wrong? You're so quiet and now you're so jumpy."

"No," Anne said. "No, I'm fine. I'm sorry. Since I can't do much to help you at the moment, do you mind if I go practice my division?"

But without even waiting for an answer, Anne picked up her bookstrap with her good hand and went up the stairs.