In the Woods When First We Met

178. Harm, Part II

Billy.

Anne's breath caught in her throat.

He was here, here in her house.

Why?

He took a step toward her.

"Anne," he said, trying to sound sweet, but missing the mark terribly.

Anne did not say anything. Her ears buzzed in her head, too loudly to focus.

"What- what are you doing here?" she asked, her voice faltering. Then, realizing she did not care to hear the answer, she said, "Go away."

"But Anne," Billy said, coming closer.

Anne began backing away.

"Anne, listen, I...I want to apologize."

Billy kept walking closer.

Why? Why is he doing this? Does he know I'm alone? Does he know my family isn't home?

There was Gilbert, she thought desperately. Gilbert was here. Gilbert had left to go outside only a few seconds ago. It would take just a few minutes to use the privy and then he'd be right back. She began glancing around the room for something she could use to protect herself.

Billy reached out and grabbed her hand.

It was like fire, burning through her skin, but she felt frozen. She could not pull away.

Billy dropped to his knees. "I'm begging you, Anne, forgive me. Please. I'm so sorry. I hate myself for it."

"That's both of us, then" Anne heard the words before she realized they'd come from her.

At that response, the mask Billy was wearing slipped off just slightly, and for a fraction of a second, Anne saw the rage he was hiding. But as quickly as the rage splashed across his face, it was gone, and he smiled, slipping the mask back on. He stood up from the floor slowly, saying in a sweet and gentle voice, "I don't blame you for hating me. But can't we put it behind us and start over? I want us to be friends. Or more. I...I think I love you, Anne."

That was enough to break Anne out of her frozen state. She yanked her hand away from him.

He didn't react to that, he was going to keep up this charade- why? She didn't know.

He took another step closer. They were at the edge of the parlor by this point, but Anne backed away from him again.

"I don't understand why you're..." She shook her head, unable to finish.

"Anne, I've been so wrong, behaved so terribly. If you could forgive me, if we could just start over, then everything will be different. I promise."

Anne tried to take another step back but found she was at Marilla's bedroom door. She could try to get inside and barricade the door, maybe, if she was quick enough.

But her first effort would be to see if he'd leave on his own. Maybe if she just told him what he wanted to hear-

"Billy, um...I do. I forgive you. All right? Everything is fine between us. Don't worry about it."

She slipped her hand behind her, to grasp the doorknob behind her back.

"Really?" Billy asked, desperation in his voice.

"Of course," she said, managing a smile.

He took a deep breath. "Good."

They just stared at each other a moment. Anne's hand was behind her on the doorknob, but she didn't know if she should turn it and try to get in quickly, or if Billy had been placated and would disappear on his own. She'd forgiven him, what was he still waiting on?