In the Woods When First We Met

73. Make Some Cheer

I've got to do something to distract myself, she decided. And if I do end up with a baby, I've got to do all the playing I can do, before it's too late for me to have any fun.

Anne was disappointed that the snow wasn't the right consistency for making a snow man. I wish it was packing snow, she thought. If it was packing snow I could make a snowman. And I could make snowballs. But then she sighed. It doesn't matter, she thought. I don't have anyone to throw snowballs at anyway.

She decided to make snow angels. But she only got about halfway laying down on the ground before she felt the most alarming sense of panic. I can't, she thought, her throat closing. I can't lay down on the ground. And she got quickly up, breathing hard.

She stood there a moment, trying to calm down and breathe.

She'd had no idea that sudden panic would overtake her if she tried laying on the ground, and it was an upsetting thing to her, since she was used to relishing in the nature around her, wonderfully at home rolling among the grass. Now, she could not bring herself to lie on the ground. It was something else that had been taken from her, and she wondered if she would ever get it back.

Once the wave of panic settled itself, she began walking through the snow, to write huge letters by making lines with her boots. She walked in the shape of a cursive A, and continued in an N and another N, and finally a cursive E. Then she walked farther away so she could stand back and look at what she'd written. Each letter was even taller than she was, and seeing her name written so big and bold made her feel braver.

Then she thought, Now I'll make a face. She walked in a big circle, creating a line in the snow with her boots, and then jumped as far she could into the middle of it, to make a dent in the snow where an eye should be. She nearly lost her balance and it made her laugh.

She jumped again, as far as she could to the other side of the circle. Now it's got two eyes, she thought. Now it needs a nose. And she hopped down to where the nose would be.

When she tried to jump further down, to start on the mouth, she tripped and fell forward, her face going right into the snow. She laughed again and tried to hop down again, this time making it. She walked in a semi circle, her boots scuffling through the snow to make a mouth.

Then she jumped as far as she could, to get outside the circle. She turned around and looked at her results. The eyes and nose looked all right, but there was a line from the nose to the mouth, where she'd fallen. That's all right, she thought, it's nose is running. The thought made her laugh. But then her own nose began to run, so she went back inside.

Marilla was waiting for her with a cup of cocoa.