Love Is

What Was I Thinking?

The next day, Jessica was at Sarah and Lily's telling them about her plan to help Evan and Phil.

Jessica asked Sarah and Lily to help with watching her house and watering her plants. Also, Jessica asked Sarah for the biggest favor which was taking over for her at the bookstore.

They of course said they would do all she had requested and were very understanding why Jessica chose to help Evan and his father.

Emily however was against the idea but she had no say once Phil had put his foot down. It was his life and he chose to stay at the beach house with Jessica.

On Friday, Jessica picked up Evan and Phil then drove to the beach house.

Once there, Jessica showed Phil and Evan where they would be staying. Phill will be staying in the guest room down the hall and Evan would stay in the guest room right by Jessica's room.

Jessica gave them time to get settled and she too got settled in her bedroom. She unpacked her things while Lola laid on the bed.

Their first night at the beach house was quiet and gloomy. Jessica was determined to get Phil out to the beach for a walk. Maybe that would help boost up his spirits. Even it's just a little.

The next morning, Jessica suggests to walk along the beach after breakfast. At first, Phil had said no, but when Jessica asked again, he stood up from his seat then walked outside with her.

They walked along the beach, Phil looking out at the ocean. In a way, watching the water going and coming onto shore was calming.

"Maybe we can come for a walk each morning?" Jessica said. "It's important to keep moving."
Phil sighed and said. "All I want to do is be with Julie."

Jessica stopped walking while Phil continued. In that moment, it was like looking in a mirror. She had repeated those exact words so many times before. "All I want to do is be with Daniel." She understood exactly what Phil was feeling.

Phil noticed that Jessica had stopped. He turned and asked. "Are you alright?"
Jessica caught up to Phil and said. "Yes. It's just...I used to say that a lot when my husband passed. My friends were just so worried about me."
"I didn't know you were married." Phil said as they resumed their walk.
"Yes. Daniel and I were married for 25 years." She said. "He and I had made plans a year before he died of adopting. We had tried for so long to have a baby. Before we started the process of adopting, I found out I was pregnant. I was going to tell him the same night he died. I felt the same way you do. So much so that I wasn't taking care of myself and...and I lost my baby. That was three years ago. I'm not going to lie, Phil. The pain will always be there, but you have to find a way to keep going. Especially for Evan. He needs you just as much as you need him. Don't give up."

For the first time in three years, Jessica was able to speak about Danny and the baby without crying. She felt the need to be strong for Phil so he could see that he too can move on.

Although she still needed to work on herself in order to completely move on, she needed to be strong for Phil.

The rest of their walk was spent in comfortable silence. Phil thought about what Jessica said and also he thought about his son. Jessica was right, Evan needed him.

As the weeks passed by, Evan saw Jessica getting closer to his father. He didn't understand why. He didn't like it.

Jessica was with Phil most of the time.
They went on walks every morning after breakfast and just talked for hours.

She just wanted to let him know that he wasn't alone. She too had lost a spouse and knew exactly what he feeling. By helping Phil, she was slowly finding the strength to move on with her life and live again.

It was very therapeutic for Jessica to have these talks with Phil.

Phil was grateful to Jessica and slowly, he was finding ways to cope with his loss.

Three weeks into their stay, Jessica and Phil found themselves playing checkers in the living room.

After placing his checker into one of the squares on the board, Phil sat back and said. "Never in a million years would I have thought that Julie would go before me. I was the one that was taking all these medications. Blood pressure, cholesterol Medication..." he stopped and sighed.

He stood up and continued as he walked over to the fireplace. "We would always talk about how Evan and her would manage when I was gone."

Jessica stood up then walked over to Phil and said. "You and Evan will be fine. You'll get through this. I believe in you."

In that moment, a weight felt as if it was being lifted from her shoulders. To Jessica, losing Danny would always hurt but not as much. She believed that Phil would some day be okay.

She placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it gently for comfort then said. "I promise, it'll be okay." She smiled a little.

Phil smiled back and placed a hand on her elbow and chuckled a little.

Just then Evan walked into the living room and saw them. He put his glass of soda down he had been drinking a little too harshly.

Phil and Jessica turned and saw Evan rush out of the room.
Jessica turned to Phil and said. "I'll go get him."

Phil nodded and Jessica ran to catch up with Evan.

Evan had walked out the back door and onto the beach. Jessica caught up with him and said. "Evan! Evan wait! Talk to me, okay?"

Evan turned to Jessica and said angrily. "Why are you always touching my dad?! I don't want you touching him! I don't like it."
"Your father is sad, Evan. I'm comforting him." Jessica said gently.
"I'm sad too!" Evan said.
"I know you are." Jessica said.
"Then why don't you comfort me too?" He asked.
"Oh, Evan." Jessica sighed sadly.

She moved closer to him and hugged him. She had been so wrapped up in helping Phil move on, she had been neglecting to do the same for Evan.

Evan hugged her back and for the first time ever, he felt his feelings for Jessica grow into something he was just beginning to understand.

They hugged each other for a moment, then Evan buried his face into Jessica's neck. A second later, Evan began to kiss Jessica along her neck then made his way to her lips.

Jessica was caught off guard but didn't fight it. She actually kissed him back. In that moment, all of Jessica's thoughts floated away and first time in a long time, she felt her heart skip a beat in a good way.

They kissed some more as their hands traveled over their bodies until they heard Phil's voice calling for them. They quickly pulled apart.

"Evan! Jessica!" He yelled. "Everything alright?"
"Yes! We're fine, Phil." Jessica said. "We'll be right in!"

Jessica then lowered her voice and said to Evan. "We have to talk about what just happened later, privately. Just the two of us, okay?"
Evan nodded but didn't say anything.
"We have to go back in now. Let's go." Jessica said.

Once again Evan nodded and was the first to move. Jessica followed close behind and all she could think was. "What the hell just happened? Why am I feeling this way towards Evan? I shouldn't have let him kiss me! What was I thinking!?"

That night, Jessica was all Evan could think about. He thought about the kiss he gave Jessica and he soon fell asleep with a smile on his face and his heart full.

I hope you all are still enjoying this story!
More to come soon.