rose garden | minsung.

lmh ♡ .31

the next day was awkward to say the least. word had gotten around we broke up which meant attention. people started whispering things around. it was hard to ignore but i eventually just felt numb to it. it didn't matter to me nothing did. it went on like this for a few days as everyone was talking about us. people would try to come up to me and ask me what happened but i'd just walk away from it.

i had told changbin. i didn't want him to find out about it through rumors. so he had been there for both me and jeongin. we would spend more time together. we'd buy ice cream watch movies and judge how our lives went to shit through the movie not really paying attention. i wasn't alone like the first time when i dealt with this but now i wish i was because seeing jeongin get harassed by multiple people who have never spoken a word to him infuriates me. he hasn't really been the same since i can't say i have been either.

during class i just look ahead and focus on what they are teaching me completely ignoring the boy next to me who i have missed and just want back. i'd ignore the girls that would turn around to get my attention as they just wanted to date me now that i was single not caring a bit for how i felt at the moment. and it disgusted me that this is how people are.

we haven't spoken a word or exchanged a glance to each other since. jeongin has been quiet ever since. he doesn't even look or talk to hyunjin at all or anyone else for that matter except me or changbin. it still did hurt however because no matter how hard i tried and focus on my work at the end of the day when i go to sleep i think of him. how we would be cuddling in bed if we hadn't gone to that stupid party.

at lunch no different. hyunjin felix and jisung weren't around the cafeteria. it was just me changbin and jeongin. i would just study and study whenever i was in school or do homework or extra work. i wanted my mind off him. i wanted the pain to leave and for me to feel closure but with every day the pain would just eat at me even more. there was times where no matter if i was working out or studying to get my mind off it i would cry and cry at a sudden memory. i felt pathetic to say the least.

i would have multiple missed messages from woojin trying to check up on me but i couldn't answer him. i didn't want to talk. i hadn't even messaged jaehyun like i said i would. i even got messages from ten telling me to stop messaging his boyfriend even though i wasn't.

it was finally friday after a long painful few days. we skimmed through options of what movies to watch that we hadn't already watched. we had joined our beds together so that we could all sleep in together. changbin would come into mine and jeongin's dorm to sleep with us. he'd go out to the convenience store and get a whole bunch of snacks and drinks. he even got beer which was stupid since jeongin won't drink. he got jeongin his favorite gummy's but they remained untouched. i saw him rumble through the bag and i felt my heart drop when i saw a bag of honey butter chips. tears welled up in my eyes before i could stop them and next thing i knew i was crying like a high school girl going through her first breakup. changbin panicked as he tossed the bag on jeongin's bed quick to my side to rub my back but i just couldn't stop crying anymore. i thought about all the stupid small things that reminded me of jisung and i was sobbing. jeongin got upset he listened quietly before he started to cry. changbin was flustered he didn't know what to do when someone was crying let alone two people.

he kept telling us they were no good but i didn't believe him. it would have been easier to lie to myself and say they were no good but i couldn't. i wanted comfort more than anything but i didn't want it from just anybody. i wanted it from the boy who cause it in the first place.

as more days had passed by. people still talked about it but not as much. what pissed me off was hearing people bad mouthed jisung. they didn't have a right. they didn't even know him. they weren't even in a relationship with him so how would they know. i had dealt with those people personally and it went down a bit. despite what happened i didn't see jisung like they did. i still had hope that things would get better. that he would still choose me in the end..

it only annoyed how some girls harassed me. they couldn't take a damn hint that i wasn't interested. it didn't seem to stop them. some would even follow me to class which only irked me. i told them i didn't want to just start something with them because i didn't like them but here they are following me. i got tired of telling them off that now i don't even care if they still follow me. it's not like they are going to stop. some even gave me letters to declare their love for me when they have never spoken a word to me. i would take them though and just stuff them in my folders. i wasn't going to open them. some i couldn't stand as they would whisper and shove each other as they looked at me. it made me uncomfortable especially some that even tried following me to my room.

i thought things would have died down by now and gotten better but it proved me wrong. i didn't have a ounce of privacy except when i was in my room. i just wish i could stay in all day to have time to myself at this point. those girls would watch my every move it proved difficult to do anything with them around.

i had finished my classes for the day and was planning of going to my room and self loathe. you know the usual. but i had company of course. i would roll my eyes at this point when one of them even breathe. as i was nearing my dorm i was already losing my patience. i turned to look at them as they stopped waiting for my next move.

"leave." i told them simply not caring if i sounded rude at this point. they were invading my personal space and the university didn't do anything about it.

"oppa..." one of the girls began i shook my head at her.

"no i am not your oppa now leave i'm going to my room." i told them sternly hoping it would get through their empty heads.

"don't be like this oppa" she began again completely ignoring me. i in took a sharp breath as my patience was thinning. the more i spent talking to idiots.

"i said leave!" i raised my voice higher now. a few of the girls whimpered but i couldn't careless. a few left except for the girl who spoke.

i didn't spare her a glance as i began walking towards my room. i looked for my keys when i noticed her still there. i turned my body to look at her. she was looking at the floor now.

"did you not hear me?" i asked her obviously annoyed with her sole presence. she reached out and grabbed my arm instead. it made me flinch at the contact. i could hear the door open behind me and i felt jeongin's hand on my shoulder.

the girl finally left and i walked into the room alone. jeongin pulled me into his bed. he cuddled up against me as he opened my laptop going through my netflix without a word.

he looked at the screen blankly before he pulled out his phone. i was going to say something but he placed his pointer finger to his mouth and i closed my mouth. i could feel a sharp pain piercing into my heart when i saw him hit hyunjin's contact. it rang a few before he answered. luckily i wasn't in view but i could see his face, making me feel upset.

"hyung, are you alone?" jeongin mumbled quietly. i didn't have anything else to do so i listened.

"yeah, i'm just picking up something from the store. what happened?" hyunjin looked around as he answered

"why'd you do it hyung?" jeongin could only sniffle as he tried to control his emotions that were getting the best of him.

"it's really not what it seems, i just wanted to help him have an even better time and-" hyunjin started to explain and i could feel my heart breaking all over again. i can only imagine how much pain jeongin must feel hearing this from his best friend who he loves.

"i don't want to hear your excuses. i just want the truth. minho was right to stop talking to the both of you." jeongin interrupted him and i knew he only did so because he knew the answer would be something that would make him even more upset. i wanted to embrace him but i couldn't do anything yet.

"so you're gonna listen to what minho has to say and not me? what the hell makes what he did so great? you know what? fine jeongin. go follow minho and don't bother talking to me either." he nearly shouted over the phone.

what did i do?

"fine, i will." jeongin responded ending the call as he finally broke.

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