Chasing Stars: part of the Chasing Forever series: Book 3

Chapter 69 "I'm sorry"

Emma's P.O.V.

"It's for you" mom said looking over her shoulder at me. confused i wheeled over to the door.

I opened it wider and saw her. she looked so much more mature! her dark drown hair was down in natural waves and her lips more red than i remember. her cheeks were a light pink instead of the pail skin colour they used to be .her eyes were warmer then before, not as cold and her mouth wore a smile. something i haven't seen on her for a long time

"Lacy" i gasped, tears forming in my eyes. "i'm sorry" she said allowing a tear to fall. i hadn't notice she was on the verge of crying. She threw herself in my arms.

my best friend is back!

I squeezed my eyes shut forcing my tears out. "i missed you" i said with a quivering voice. partly because i was happy and part of it was fear that she would stab me in the back just as i start to trust her again. "i miss you" she whispered back.

I turned my chair around and looked at my mom (who was now standing by the couch) harry and the girls. "can you give us a minute?" i asked. they nodded and Harry went down stairs with the girls and mom went down the hallway and into her room.

Lacy sat down on the couch and i parked beside her.

"Nothing has changed about this house" she said looking around "except for the T.V. and coffee table" she added realizing they were different.

My mind flashed back to that night. the night the T.V. and coffee table got smashed. the same night i lost my legs.

I shivered at the memory and then quickly dismissed it from my mind.

"You remember?!" i asked shocked she remembered what my house looked like! it's like five years since she's stepped foot in my house! "How could i forget?! all my best memories are in this house" she said looking around again. i smiled

"Last time i sat here was when you told me you were-" she cut herself off "pregnant" i finished her sentence "yah that" she agreed uncomfortably

"Sorry about your-" she cut her self off again "your chair" she said quietly "i've learned to love it" i smiled at her "really?" She asked happily...content at the thought of me being happy. "no!" i laughed. soon she joined me.

"This is nice" i smiled once we calmed down from out laughing fit.

"I'm sorry i wasn't a batter friend to you...i didn't give you the comfort you needed...when you needed me the most I-" i cut her off

"when will you stop apologizing?!"

"Well...with the amount of stuff i did to you...what i put you through...never" she sighed.

"Hey! it's fine!" i said quietly, almost a whisper. "if it wasn't for you i wouldn't have made some really great friends" i smiled at her and she smiled back.

"How is Ron-" she cut herself off again. my smile quickly faded and tears grew in my eyes. "i'm sorry" Lacy sighed "it's ok" i said, my voice cracking.

"hows Charlie?!" she asked changing the subject. more tears grew in my eyes "i haven't heard from her since she left for Regina...in three or so years" i said holding back my tears and my voice cracking. "i'm sorry" Lacy said again. i didn't say anything.

"I should go" she said standing up from the couch. i didn't say anything "we should get together some time" She said turning around to face me "you know where to find me" i forced a bit of a smile. Lacy nodded and then opened the door "Lacy!" i yelled after her and she turned to face me again "it was nice seeing you" i tried to smile again but i couldn't, my tears were to powerful. I'm surprised i held them back for that long! "you too" Lacy smiled and then walked out the door.

As soon and she left i raced to the hallway and to my room. i slammed the door shut behind me and broke down in tears. i let out a scream and thats when mom tried to open my door but the back of my chair was against it. i cried some more as mom tried to get in saying things like "Em let me in! i want to talk! Emma please"

Finally i couldn't take it anymore! despite the happy event that just happened the pain was to much to bare! i had to put an end to it.

Still crying i locked the door and wheeled over to my desk. "Emma open up!" mom yelled "i'm sorry" i whispered through my tears and opened the drawer "Emma! please open the door!" Mom yelled. i pulled out the knife that i kept. "EMMA! mom screamed "Mom! calm down!" i yelled still crying. "Emma please just open the door" she cried "i'm sorry" i cried grasping the knife tightly "Emma! let us in!" i heard Sophia yell "I can't! There gone! Your gone! In a few days Ronny will be gone! Harry will be gone! i have no one!" I cried "Emma don't do anything!" I heard Harry yell. the door knob was still jiggling telling me they were still trying to get in. I squeezed the knife in my hand and raised in to my throat "tell Ronny i love her" i cried "EMMA!" mom screamed "i love you" i whispered and rested the tip of the knife on my neck, closed my eyes and prepared myself for the pain. Then i heard it! "EMMA JUST LET ME IN!" mom screamed.

This isn't the only way! i just have to let her in! i have to talk to her!

My eyes shot open and i dropped the knife. from then on everything went in slow motion.

The door swung open and mom, Sophia and Harry ran in, tears running down all their cheeks. mom ran to me and wrapped her arms around me and i did the same. Sophia stood by my door and cried until she join mom and I in a hug. i squeezed my eyes together and when i opened them again i saw Harry picking up the knife and looking up at me with absolute worry on his face. then he dropped the knife and wrapped his arms around all of us. And all this time all mom was saying was "i'm sorry. i'm sorry. i'm sorry

We all stayed there, hugging, crying.

Authors note

This chapter is dedicated to all the bullied kids in the world! if you think this is the only way out your wrong! theres always another way! Your worth it! and i love you!

Thank you