Totoo na ba ito?

43 : Closed eyes

"You're 7 weeks pregnant, Miss," ngiti ng doktora sa akin. "Or missis?"

Ngumiti na lamang ako at imbes na tumugon ay inilipat ko ang aking tingin sa monitor, kung saan ipinapakita ang nasa loob ng aking tiyan. Of course, my baby isn't completely evident pero alam kong nariyan siya. I looked at Sabrina as she started tearing up. I chuckled at her reaction at mabilis niya akong inirapan at niyakap. Pagkatapos ng checkup ay bumalik na kami ni Sabrina sa condo ko.

"Ano nang plano mo ngayon?" Tanong niya habang inililiko ang kotse. "I mean, I know it's hard for you to take everything in but you need to be more rational now for your baby."

Nag-angat ako ng tingin sa kanya habang hinahaplos ang aking tiyan. "I'm planning to go back to Tarlac and tell my parents."

"W-what about... you know," she shrugged. "Ashton? Siya ang ama, hindi ba?"

"I still have a lot in mind, Sab. At mas magandang sabihin ko muna kina Mommy," sabi ko. "I don't wanna come after Ashton just because I'm pregnant."

"Pregnant with his child," Sabrina corrected as she parked the car. "He's responsible for that."

"I don't feel the need to inform him..." katuwiran ko pa.

Pagkaakyat namin ay tinawagan ni Sab sina Gwen upang pumunta rito mamayang gabi. She told them we'll have dinner at pinaunlakan naman nila ito. Ang hindi nila alam ay sasabihin ko rin sa kanila ang kalagayan ko ngayon.

"So first, kakain. Tapos kapag magaan ang mood," she raised her finger with authority. "Sasabihin mong may importante kang announcement. Then, that's it."

"I just hope Jeremiah won't flip the table," I managed to joke around.

"Sisipain ko siya kapag nangyari 'yon," she crossed her arms.

Sabrina presented to cook for our dinner kaya natulog na muna ako dahil ayaw niya raw na mapagod ako. I laid down on my bed but I couldn't sleep kaya imbes na subukang matulog ay nag-isip-isip muna ako. I placed my hand on top of my stomach, trying to feel how it changed. Celyne told me last week that it seemed like I gained weight but I didn't pay attention to her remark. Bumuntong-hininga ako at tinitigan ang puting kisame.

The first thing I'm planning to do is to file a leave and go home to Tarlac. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko sasabihin kay Mommy, lalo na kay Daddy, pero kailangan. I'm sure my cousins would help kaya hindi ako masyadong kinakabahan. Takot lang talaga ako ngayon at nalulungkot para sa anak ko. Malungkot ako dahil nabuo siya sa hindi tamang pagkakataon at incapable pa ang magiging ina niya. But I'll do whatever I can just to make my baby feel loved and okay. Hindi na importante kung may kapasidad ba ako o ano. Basta ang dapat kong gawin ay magsumikap at ayusin ang aking sarili.

"Just hang in there, bud," mahina kong sinabi at patuloy na hinaplos ang aking tiyan.

Nang tawagin ako ni Sabrina upang lumabas ay sumunod na ako. Our cousins arrived after a few minutes at may dala pa silang ibang mga pagkain. Nang makita ang box ng pizza na dala ni Jeremiah at naamoy ito ay halos maduwal ako ngunit hindi ko na lang ipinahalata. I suddenly felt nervous especially with the thought that I'm about to tell them something big.

"Naudlot pa ang lakad. But I'm so hungry!" Jeremiah groaned and feasted over the food on the table.

Tahimik ko lang silang pinagmamasdan at kanina pa kami nagtitinginan ni Sabrina. I really didn't know which was the right time to interrupt or tell them kaya nanatili akong nakayuko at kumakain.

"You okay, Mads?" Tanong ni Gwen sa aking tabi. "Ang tahimik mo ngayon."

"Yeah, I'm fine," ngumiti ako sa kanya. Maybe I should tell them now habang masaya pang kumakain si Jeremiah at nakatuon ang kanilang atensiyon sa akin. "I-I just wanted to tell you guys something."