The Last Love Of Arthur Morgan

As Days Go By

"Still nothing?" Lorna questioned.

Charles shook his head."No, I haven't seen him. I'm sorry, Lorna."

"I just don't understand. He...he left his hat here, he left me here to - to deal with Dutch." Her bottom lip began to quiver."Excuse me."

Lorna rushed off down into the trees, where Thomas was murdered a few days ago. Charles tied Tamia to the hitching post and followed after her. 

As he grew nearer, he heard sniffling and whispering. At first he thought someone was with her, but when he peered around the tree, he saw her sitting alone. He stood behind the same tree, listening.

She sniffled wiping her face."I've done nothing wrong, God, I've always done good. I know Arthur is a good man, I do. It's Dutch, he is the poison. And Arthur is so loyal to him." Her fingers balled the fabric of her dress."And what happened won't change that fact. Arthur loves Dutch - he's the father he never had. But I'm beginning to think he was better off without one!"

"Lorna."

She spun around, jumping to her feet. She quickly wiped all evidence off her face that showed she had been crying. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to run off like that."

"Don't be sorry." He stepped closer."...I heard what you said and it's true. I've only been with the gang a year and...I've seen what happens to Arthur when he's around Dutch. He changes."

"I don't know what to do, Charles, it's been three days." She waved her hand."He has never been gone this long before, not without telling us where he was going first!"

Charles placed a hand on Lorna's arm."It's okay, I'm here. I'll keep an eye on you and the baby until he comes-"

"No, you have to find him. He..." She exhaled a breath."He's sick, very sick. He hasn't told anyone yet and I don't think he will. He could be hurt."

"Sick?" He raised a brow.

Lorna bowed her head."Tuberculosis."

Charles heaved a sigh and shook his head."I'm sorry."

She looked up at him, her brown eyes pleading with him to help her find Arthur. He nodded, pulling Lorna into his arms, letting her cry on his newly cleaned shirt.

"I'll find him. I promise."

She nodded and pulled away from the embrace."Thank you, Charles. You've always been such a good friend to me."

He smiled."It's not often that I come across good people like you and Arthur."

Lorna stayed behind, watching as Charles climbed the hill back to camp. She leaned against a tree, looking up at the sky, wondering where Arthur could be? Apart of her knew he was okay, but another part of her was terrified.

...

I don't understand why the world hates me. I've done nothing to offend it, I've actually lessened it's load. I love nature and all the smells and views that come with it, yet, she finds a way to punch me in the gut every time I turn around.

I'm dying. I have Tuberculosis. I can feel it slowly killing me and every time I take a breath, I am reminded that I am dying. I guess this is my punishment for all the wrong I've done, specifically, to Mr. Thomas Downes.

I...don't know what else I have to do or say to be forgiven for my sinning. I don't even know if God is listening to me or if he cares. I never did care about him, which is obvious, but now I'm begging for his forgiveness.