THE LOVECHILD Ft.Trey Songz

reflect

I don't know how I missed all the signs. I shook my head, "All of the fucking signs were there," I said aloud to myself. A few days had passed since I learned that I had fathered Tarahji. Since then, I hadn't really seen or talked to Laila. I had a feeling that she was kind of giving me some space to think, and that part was true, I did and wanted to get comfortable with the thought that I was a father. But what I really wanted from her right now was instead of giving me space, she needed to answer my questions.

There was no way I could deny Tarahji of being my daughter. She may have had her mother's hazel eyes. But, she looked just like me. She had my skin tone, that curly hair that ran through my family, and I hadn't really thought about it until now but her name kind of rhymed with my name. She was beautiful. I chuckled at the thought of the first time we met and then frowning as I remembered the day in the elevator. We had hit it off just great. She had a cute sense of humor. I smiled.

And then I sighed, as I thought back to the day when I was leaving off to college. I should've known then when she was clinging on to me for too long and crying hysterically that something was wrong. I knew something was wrong, but I just couldn't pin point it. When I asked her what was wrong, she had lied to me. She told me that she was fine, that everything was okay. But still I didn't believe her, but I didn't press her to tell me either. I just left it at that.

But, what if I had known that she was pregnant? Would I have still gone to college? Why had she been hiding the fact that she was pregnant with my baby? Was she trying to save me from giving up on my dreams? To top it off why hadn't she told my parents? Had she known then that day when I was leaving that she was pregnant? If she hadn't known then, why hadn't she gone to them afterwards to tell them?

"FUCK!" I cursed completely forgetting about telling my parents about Tarahji. It really hadn't registered in my mind these last couple of days. I was just so upset these past few days about learning about my daughter the way I did, that I hadn't even told them what was up. But, then again, I hadn't been really talking to my mom's lately because of my engagement to Latoya. It had completely slipped my mind. I made a mental note that I would see them soon to tell them.

I mean if my parents had known about Laila being pregnant, of course they would've been pissed, especially my mother. But after being around each other and knowing that fact that there would be another Samuels, my mother would've still done the respectable thing, accept Tarahji as her granddaughter. And besides that she loved babies. She couldn't hold a grudge forever. All though I don't know these days since she was still tripping over about the fact that I wanted to marry Latoya.

"Ah, SHIT!" I cursed for the second time in the last few minutes. Latoya. She had no idea about Tarahji also. I knew all hell was about to break loose when she finds out that I had a child with Laila. She wasn't too happy the last time when she discovered that Laila and I had dated before. This new information was about to make shit only worst. But I knew I had to tell her nonetheless. Tarahji was my daughter and I was not going to deny her.

What I told Laila that night before the accident, were my true feelings about her. I had never stopped loving her. And yeah, I feel like I'm making a mistake in marrying Latoya. It was just something about Latoya that I hadn't really paid much attention to before that was now rubbing me the wrong way. And I was kind of thinking about breaking shit off with Latoya soon, but slowly. But, then this shit comes up.

Shit, had I known then that she was pregnant; I would have probably been on the first flight out of FAM to come home to her. I probably would have wifed her up a long time ago, moved into an apartment or something and gone to school down here. There was no doubt that I wouldn't take care of the both of them. I loved her and I there was no doubt for the love that already have for that little girl. She was mines.