THE LOVECHILD Ft.Trey Songz

buttin'OUT .

I walked across the hall back to my condo and unlocked it. Alicia and Miranda were sitting on my couch talking already when I walked in. As soon as I closed the door behind me they stopped talking and looked at me. I walked passed them and walked towards the kitchen to grab me a water bottle. Once I got it I joined them in the living room.

I plopped down on the couch next to Miranda and just stared into space. I knew they wanted to know how the talk went with Jay. They had kind of encouraged me to go over to his place earlier, while they stayed here and free-load all the food from my fridge.

These last couple of days that passed has been kind of...hard. Every time I looked at my daughters face I'm reminded of him. I'm reminded of how I had lied to the both of them. How we couldn't take back those years that have passed. I had messed up big time.

From the corner of my eyes I saw the two of them looking at each other and both nudging each other to ask me what had happened. "So," Mimi finally said after rolling her eyes at Alicia. "How did things go?" she asked me. "Did everything go fine?" she asked me. I knew she was just trying to stay positive for me right now.

I stared at the blank television screen in front of me before taking a deep breath. I thought back to the conversation that had just taken place just minutes before. "Well," I began. "It went kind of better than I expected." I told them. "I thought he was going to hit me or really curse me out." I told them. "But, he just really listened to me. He listened to everything that I had been feeling and why I hadn't told him. And well... he gave me the answer that I had been pondering on for the past few years." I paused. "He wants to be a part of Tarahji's life." I finally told them.

They both smiled and let out a sigh of relief, "See, I told you you didn't have to worry too much about him wanting to be a part of that child's life." She told me.

"Yeah," Alicia said. "But it would have saved us so much drama if she had been told him a long time ago that he was going to be a daddy." She said. "She wouldn't have gone through all that alone." I nodded my head with them agreeing.

I bit my bottom lips to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall, "I'm sorry I put you guys through all that shit." I said apologizing. "I shouldn't have never made you guys promise not to tell him." I told them.

"Oh, girl," Alicia started. She walked over to sit on the other side of me. She placed her arm around my shoulder. "You know you my girl." She said. "You know I would never go against your word... even though I didn't agree with your plan, and I so wanted to go and tell him myself plenty of times. But, I didn't. I have so much respect for you." We both hugged each other.

I laughed, "Thanks for putting up with my shit," We all laughed. "I should have been told him about her before he left. No matter if I was scared or not." They both nodded their head agreement with me.

"So when are you going to tell Rahji about her father?" Ali asked me. I knew she wasn't really trying to push me or rush me about telling her about her father. She just wanted to know.

I shook my head, "I don't know but I know I've got tell her soon. Maybe I'll tell her when she wakes up later. I don't know how I'm going to get out of that lie I told her." I told them. They both nodded their heads as the room took on a silence.

"So now that he knows about Rahji and wants to be a part of her life... where does that leave you two?" Miranda asked breaking the silence.

I shrugged my shoulders and looked away from those two, "Tarahji's parents and that's all." I told them honestly. The two of them looked at each other and then back at me. I broke the seal of the water bottle and took a few sips before closing it. I placed it on a coaster that was on the table in front of me.

"What do you mean 'Tarahji's parents and that's all'?" Miranda asked me. Alicia just sat there not saying anything.

"It is what I said." I told them as I looked back at the television screen. "We've both agreed that we'd raise Tarahji together and that's all." I told them.

"So, you mean to tell me that you ain't going to tell him about his cheating fiancé?"Miranda asked me. I thought about it for a second and thought about all the shit I put him through. And then I thought about what he had said to me a few minutes back. I had hurt him badly. And like he said he didn't have any trust in me. So ...

I shook my head no, "I'm not going to tell him anything." I told them. I shrugged my shoulders. "It ain't my business to but into their relationship." I said. "If she wants to tell him... then that's good. She could lie to him all she wants. That's their relationship and I'm not butting in."

"So, you mean to tell me that you gone let that fine brother— the father of your child marry that hoe?" Miranda asked me. "And you're not going to fight for him?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "What am I suppose to fight for?" I asked her looking at both of them. "The man told me that he doesn't want anything to do with me. That he only want me to do right by his daughter. THE MAN DOES NOT TRUST ME!" I told them.

"You're suppose to fight for love. You love him and I'm sure he still loves you. I think you should say something to him. Try to stop him from marrying her—"

I shook my head, "No, I'm not doing anything. If he's happy with her and decides to marry her then so be it. He mind as well. I messed up my chances with him. She could keep her secret a secret for all I care and have him. I give up. She wins."

"No she doesn't," Alicia finally spoke up. "You can still win him back. All you've got to do is fight for him—gain back his trust, and tell him about his cheating fiancé. The man is still in love with you." Alicia said. "I saw the way he kept looking at you when—"

I shook my head again and cut her off, "No," I said. "I'm not going to fight. She can have him, marry him, and if she wants... have his babies. As long as he does his part in my child's life I'll be okay." I told them. The two looked at each other in disbelief. Before any of them tried to open their mouths to protest my decision, I got up from the couch to go and check on my baby who was napping.

She wins.