The Maia and Ross Diaries

C52 - With Identity

Identity. Identity is what defines us, of course in the name of information, and it is what makes people feel for you. It depends on who you are and why you are are a part of their lives. Identity is a must or, yes, you will feel left out. If nobody knows who you are, do you really matter?

I started spending my weekends in the same white robe and glasses reading up on "Almost Perfect" and I had just got to the part where Sage had been a boy the entire time. Ew. Ah well, it happens -- I was pretty convinced Hailey would want to turn into a boy one day, but the fact that she hasn't means I'm doing my job right.

It made me question if Ross was really a guy everytime I looked over at him on my bed sleeping (of course he's not a girl) But It gave me the perfect excuse to look. Don't judge me, you would to.

"Hey Ma-" Allie came running in my room as she stopped to grin. "Ahhwe, you whore!" She laughed.

I stopped what I was doing throwing the covers back over Ross. I'm not sure how it made me a whore, but I took the part on the look to be embarrassed. I grabbed my book mark and placed my glasses basically on Ross' back. "Is there something you want, stalker girl?" I asked.

"Mean enough." She sat by me patting Ross' butt. I slapped her hands.

She snatched the book out of my hands. "In fact I do have something in mind. It doesn't involve Brian Katcher and she-males."

"You read?" I laughed.

"You're late, I read this in sixth grade." She threw the book on the ground. "Anyways, you know how you love me right?"

The gesture looked familiar, and her eyebrow puck was a sign that she had either done something bad... or horrible. My eyes widened. "What'd you do?!"

"Its not what I did... Its what you can do." She clenched her teeth together. "Say yes?"

"What?" I asked. "Depends, what'd you do?" I knew she was covering something important out, that she did! Its one of those movies where you have to get the best friend out of trouble, really.

"Bloody nose (okay who is that?) Bianca quit the squad today - and before I ask you REMEMBER YOU LOVE ME -- and we need another girl on the team... an actual girl, not man girls, actually girls, we need smart, THIN, pretty, did I mention SMART -"

"Ohohooo NO!" I threw my covers over my face, only to see Ross' perfect little resting body, and I wished I'd been still sleeping next to it. Why did I wake up!? How did Allie get in here! Cheer leading!? Why couldn't they use somebody not pretty - just because your pretty doesn't mean anything, but it does. To them.

"Please!" Allie shrugged the covers off of me.

A cheer leader? Does Allie even know who I am. Its not a cheerleader. Nothing against it, but the only time I ever tried cheer leading was to avoid classes with Ross... and at the time I was a semi lost stupid girl, whom just wanted to be left alone. Why would I go back, what if there's another queen bitch!? Plus its not my thing, I don't cheer... I cheer in books I read, not for people.

"That department is for high society, actual thin people, and I'm pretty sure I'll be the only smart girl there." I disagreed to cheering. It wasn't long ago when they had been backing Laura up after she decided to randomly join school.

After her essay people started praising her, and to be honest If I ever got to know that Laura; I'd still hate her.

"Bitch get you're ass up!" She yawned toward me. "High society? Queen Bee's and Bad boy's we're so last year, since when are you not thin, and Nina will be there!" I let her lead me off the bed.