Kigo

On Being Sheila Gonzalez by Nate Grey

Chapter 5: The Squad Shall Inherit the Earth

James D. Pewter had been a law-abiding citizen, until the tender age of twenty-five. Then he'd become a henchman for hire, and ended up in the ranks of Dr. Drakken. It had been an okay gig, considering he constantly had his butt handed to him by a girl half his size.

But then things got weird. Drakken went legit, Shego dropped off the face of the planet, and the old gang started pulling odd jobs with little or no leadership. It was touch and go for a while, until James had stepped in with a semblance of organization and order. The goons had quickly rallied around him, and they soon had the makings of a decent goon squad.

All of which had led them to the Middleton First National Bank this fine day in July. They had cased the place for a week, and the robbery was proceeding with little deviation from the plan. Not that James had expected any problems. Despite the fact that this was Kim Possible's hometown, it was well-known that she had retired fresh out of high school. No one in the gang knew why, and really, no one cared, so long as it meant she wouldn't be dropping in on them.

Although it was pretty sweet, knowing they were getting away with this in her old stomping grounds.

James grinned to himself as another of his boys ran past, hauling a sack of cash with him. Crime really did pay, it seemed.

"Hey, Jimmy!" the lookout called from the bank's main entrance. "What'd you say the wheelman was supposed to be driving?"

Jimmy frowned. "Big black van, same as always. Why?"

"I think there's been a change of plans. This monster truck just pulled up, and there's a big guy with-"

"FREEZE!"

Jimmy whipped around, his grip tightening on the double-ended shock staff he'd kept from his days with Drakken. His gaze landed on the safe, which was currently being blocked by a young girl. She had no red hair or green eyes, so Jimmy instantly relaxed.

"Okay, boys. Now, why don't you put all that money back where you found it?" she asked sweetly. "Before I have to get tough on you."

Jimmy barely suppressed the urge to laugh. "Sorry, sweetheart. They only take orders from me, and I say we're going ahead with the plan."

The blonde arched an eyebrow. "Really? Then I guess you're the one I have to make an example of." As she spoke, her wristwatch seemed to melt and flow down her arm, encasing it in a thin, metallic sheen. She flicked her wrist, and Jimmy howled as three tiny darts embedded themselves in his neck. He stumbled into the wall, barely avoiding paralyzing himself with his own shock staff.

"GET 'ER!" Jimmy shouted hoarsely.

The blonde quicky found herself surrounded by a circle of goons, but she didn't seem concerned. Instead, she yawned and studied her nails.

That was when a second girl emerged from the safe, carrying what looked like a short staff with a star on the end of it. The brunette took one look at the scene and declared, "We really shouldn't. They're outnumbered as it is."

"I asked them nicely, and they said no," the blonde pointed out.

"Oh. Well, in that case." The brunette casually flipped her hair, tossing the staff in a fluid motion. In a matter of seconds, it circle the room, slamming into the jaw of each goon. By the time the staff returned to her hand, the men were sprawled out on the floor, moaning in pain.

Jimmy was furious. No way he was getting shut down by two Kim Possible wanna-bes. Though he'd never had cause to use it, he went for the gun on his belt, drawing a bead on the blonde.