I will never be the same without you...

Chapter 43

Song: Phum Viphurit "Softly Spoken"

I've never talked about the past this much before, but now that the floodgates had burst open, there was no holding back the tide.

"The owners are family to me. As a kid, whenever I needed to escape home, I had a seat reserved in the back, where I did my homework, ate snacks and sometimes dinner depending on how late my mom was getting home from work."

I was still a little bit awkward and insecure, and as a result felt a compulsive need to keep talking. However, he surprised me and chimed in before I had to go on.

"It seems that they looked after you well. Is it why you like cooking?"

I was absurdly happy that he showed interest in my past and my life here. It reminded me that some of it had been good which was comforting to share it with him.

"Oh gosh, no!! It was a disaster. I started to help around, as I got older. An extra pair of hands was welcome since they were busy, even back then. Eventually, they tried to teach me to cook but I almost lit the kitchen on fire. Let me tell you, I was immediately downgraded back to prep."

I laughed, remembering my very short and very scary career in the kitchen. My heart melted when he cheerfully joined in. I'd missed hearing that sound.

"It was hard to leave them when we moved up north, but I've been able to visit regularly since university. They are getting older, and I need to make sure they are comfortable and cared for."

"They do not have other relatives?"

"Just, mom and I." I hesitated for an instant, before continuing. "I've never told anyone, but they are the ones who helped us."

He nodded, looking serious. I was touched that he understood what they meant to me.

"I am thankful they cared for you and your mom."

Surprising me, he stopped and reached up to touch my face. As I enjoyed the caress, he lifted himself on tippy toes and brushed his mouth against mine. Before stepping back, he whispered, "so very thankful" against my lips, causing my heart to flutter wildly. I floated on a pink cloud for the rest of the way to the car, like the irremediably besotted fool I was.

By the time we arrived at the restaurant, I had him in stitches recounting more of my teenage exploits as a server. I parked around back as usual and we got out of the car.

"Zon, they know about me and accepted me without a second thought."

I stared at him and rubbed the back of my neck self-consciously..

"So...errr... I ... do you... I..."

I had never been so tongue-tied in my life!!! How hard is it to ask the man you love if you can introduce him as your boyfriend to your family?

My mind went blank.

I was doing what now? I never thought this trough. HOW DID I NOT THINK THIS THROUGH!! I just wanted to fix things between us... instead, I was springing this on him without warning or preparation. He already had a stressful week and I was adding to it. Things were already unsettled enough and now here I was actively trying to derail them.

Saifah, you thoughtless dingbat!!! Like a deer caught in headlights, I gawked at him with my mouth hanging open, frozen.

He looked at me with his head tilted to one side, his lopsided grin widening as my paralysis persisted.

"Sai, what do you want to say?"

His voice snapped me out of it and I abruptly closed my mouth.

"Err...I'm sorry, Zon." I sighed. "I don't want to put you on the spot. I'll say you're a friend."

"They are important to you, so do what you think is best."

Even though his features didn't change, his gaze shifted downward in an uneasy way I was starting to recognize. I walked around the car, wrapped my arms tightly around his waist, bending down to rest my head on his shoulder.

"My Zon, you got it wrong. With your consent, I will tell them we're dating. This... is what's best for me, what about you?"

I waited nervously until he flung his arms around my shoulders and clung to me, "Me too."