I will never be the same without you...

Chapter 52

song: The cure, "Love song"

The heavy traffic slowed our return down to glacial speeds, challenging my patience in the most irritating way; I wanted to share everything with Saifah. Some sort of urgency was coiling in my gut like a maelstrom, as if I might find myself adrift again if I couldn't hold him.

"Zon, if you continue tapping on the wheel like this, you're going to create a permanent groove"

Pulled out of my inner musings, I tried to smile. "Sorry, I just hate being stuck in traffic." She just laughed at me and muttered something about difficult temperaments being a trial to mothers; I almost rolled my eyes like I used to as a teenager.

At last, we made it back, but I was dragged to the kitchen to help prepare everything. The strong winds and darkening skies seemed to respond to my thoroughly cross mood. I huffed and puffed in annoyance, exasperating my mother.

"Zon, quit being a nuisance and bring these plates to the living room. And tell your dad to come get the coffee."

Finally!

I nearly tripped over my own feet in my eagerness to get to the living room. As I happily settled beside him, the contact between our thighs helped quiet down my restlessness. Still, I ate a dessert that I barely tasted while half listening to a conversation I wished was already over. Eternity could have ended faster than it took all of them to drink coffee.

"Saifah, would you like more dessert? Do you have a sweet tooth like my naughty child?"

"I'm ok, thank you. He does indeed like more than his share of dessert, maybe that's why he is so sweet."

Saifah's big smile and cheesy comment drew some giggles from my mother, a rude sound from Zol and something like "Love sure is blind" from my dad. Even though they were teasing me, my family's effort eased my heart, especially my mother whose warmth and genuine smile reminded me how wonderful she actually was. A tinge of guilt shot through me. I hadn't been a very good son of late and made a mental note to be more diligent in the future. While I was lost in thoughts the conversation had moved on.

"Zol, when is Zen coming home? Did his trip go well?"

"In a couple of days, Dad. He was quite busy but he seemed happy."

"What about you Safaih? How's your job?"

"It hasn't been too bad. We've mostly small small projects."

Their chatter went on, wholeheartedly including Saifah, something I should have been feeling thrilled about instead of fidgety. At last, the cups were empty, the plates washed and the thank yous given. I enjoyed visiting my parents, but today, I couldn't wait to leave.

The skies opened up the instant we stepped through the front door. I reached for his hand and dashed to the car, dragging him along. Drenched and laughing, we waited for the heavy rain to abate enough to drive home. As he dried my hair with a beach towel found on the back seat, he framed my face and snuck in a quick kiss, increasing my heart rate considerably.

"Are you alright, my Zon? You seemed pretty antsy during dessert."

"I... I... yeah."

I wracked my brain, trying to organize my thoughts. He gently brushed his nose against mine, keeping his eyes on me while a sexy smile danced invitingly on his lips, distracting me even more. I fought the urge to give in as he inched closer, wonderfully tempting.

"Need I remind you that, even though we cannot see well through the windows, we are still parked in front of my parents' house?"

His smile turned into a mischievous grin. "Hmmm, I like living on the edge." He kissed the corner of my mouth and lazily trailed down my jaw; I lost my train of thought for a moment, but ultimately, the compelling need to talk that had driven me all afternoon superseded my desire for him.

"Sai... just... wait a sec." He stopped, waiting for me to continue. "Any other day I'd be up for this but ... not today."

I laughed when his eyes widened in surprise. Seeing him flustered was definitely entertaining but I had to get back on track.

"I have things to tell you, but I'm not sure where to start."