Symphony || Remus Lupin

XLIX

Updated author's note (16/12/20): I don't know about the future, but as of now, we were ranked #3 in fanfiction, which (coRreCt mE If i Am WrONg) is HELLA big achievement.

*Brooklyn mob voice* 300 votes, huh? Freddy, get the booze. We gon' party tonigh'.

Warning: Mention of torture and abuse

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Myra was tired of keeping secrets. She was tired of pretending that everything was alright. She was tired of leaving her best friends in the dark. She was tired of making them worry for her but wonder why she was like this. She was tired of sneaking around behind their backs. She was tired of it all.

It was the incident with Remus, in the Common Room, that made her realize it all. With Remus being so understanding, letting her keep her secrets close to her, she knew that she could only do it for so long. It weighs a person down, keeping things from the people they love. There were some secrets that she couldn't tell, but she had no excuse for not telling her friends of her past. She had no reason not to tell them what she had been doing. And maybe they could help her. Maybe they could make the nights better.

She just wanted a break from it. She wanted them to understand her. She wanted someone to understand her.

She didn't want to be alone anymore.

∞-∞-∞

"The reason that they believed me is because I told them that I didn't want you to teach me. I don't want you to teach me Charms. I can learn by myself. I can get my friends to teach me. I don't need you!"

That's when Myra knew that Regulus was putting on a show. She hadn't known him for long, but she knew that he wasn't the type to push away people so harshly. She knew that he was a much gentler soul, that this entire conversation was tearing him apart. She could see it in his eyes.

"Oh Regulus," She said softly and she could see his anger collapse. "Why didn't you say?" Regulus didn't look at her.

"You're in so much danger," He whispered. She nodded.

"I know. I've been in danger ever since I was sorted into Gryffindor. I've lived in a constant state of paranoia and fear. I've never known whether someone would snap and go ballistic. And back at the mansion—" She stopped before she could say any more. "It was really bad."

"They're going to send members after you soon."

"I figured. It's been long enough." They sat in silence before Regulus spoke up again.

"I don't want to be a member. I don't want to be a Death Eater. I don't like hurting people just because they're not like us. I don't like the feeling of lording over someone just because they don't have something that we have." Regulus hung his head.

"Then why'd you join?" Myra asked softly. Regulus sighed, sitting down heavily.

"My parents. They support the Da— they support You-Know-Who. They aren't Death Eaters themselves but they still support him. When they found out that I was hanging around the children of Death Eaters, they were so happy. They expected me to stay with them through my years at Hogwarts and then officially join his ranks."

Myra didn't want to ask her next question, but Regulus already seemed to understand.

"I'm not brave like him," He whispered. "He's so brave. He stands for what he believes. He doesn't care bout what our parents think of him. I look up to him. I wish I could be half the person he is. Sometimes, yeah I don't really see how sleeping around really gets anyone anywhere, but for the most part, I really admire him."