Spy School: Danger is my Middle Name

The trick to escaping is not escaping in the first place

"The trick to escape is to not escape in the first place," Erica said, fingering with her handcuffs that she'd easily disarmed. It took her only a few seconds to render them useless after being encased in our prison cell

"That makes no sense whatsoever," I replied. "If we're not escaping, how do we escape?"

"We don't," Erica said. "We pretend we're trying to, making the guards perk up and try to stop us. After they stop our fake plot, the least expected thing to do is to unleash our real escape plan and catch them off guard."

"You realize the guards can hear you, correct?" I whispered to Erica in my best inside voice. "Don't speak out loud."

Erica tapped the floor beneath her, jittering her hand in a motion. It took me exactly 2.31 seconds to realize this was morse code rather than some messed up form of a habit.

That's the point, she tapped over to me. So shut it before I knock you out to make sure you don't reveal our plan.

Got it, I tapped back. Please don't kill me.

Erica nodded, which scared me a bit- I didn't know if she meant that she agreed not to kill me, or by nodding she meant okay, I'll kill you.

The guards raised their eyebrows in unison, then resumed walking around to their spots. I swear I heard them whispering something to each other, but I immediately assumed they were spreading the word of our plot.

The next few hours consisted of a few hundred morse code messages, along with Erica putting on an Oscar-worthy performance pretending we were actually going to use a different a type of escape method. I swear- if that girl had her career as an actor, she'd be the new upstart celebrity.

"So," Mike said after a long period of silence. "What do you think James is doing right now?"

"I don't know, probably being beat up by Jade or either making out with her," Jayden replied. "What do you expect? Them to burst in with AK's and save us from this?"

"Yes," I said. "I have a feeling the guards are double-crossing Jade."

"And why is that?" Erica joined in, raising her eyebrows. 

"Oh, now you talk. Earlier, I tried to get your attention for thirt minutes!" Jayden complained. "You couldn't make it more obvious that you prefer Benjamin over us."

"That's because you wanted to talk about Netflix shows. Besides, I don't even watch Netflix."

"You don't watch Netflix!?" Jayden cried. "How are you still alive!?"

"I don't know, by actually spending my time wisely?" Erica rolled her eyes. "Ben, what was all this double-crossing thing about?"

"Why don't we talk about this later?" I whispered back, tapping the floor beneath me. Erica immediately caught on, nodding and mentally agreeing to continue our conversation in morse code.

Let's see here, I tapped out. When the guard closed the door behind Jade, his expression immediately turned into the 'Murray-double-cross' look. 

Makes sense, Erica tapped back. But please don't remind me of Murray.

I wonder what's he doing right now, I communicated. Do you think he's quit his evil spying now that we've eradicated SPYDER?

He's probably eating donuts at the speed of light, Erica tapped, this time at a higher tempo. It seemed she was getting annoyed. I said don't remind me of Murray, Ben.

Sorry, I said. What do you think about my theory?

I think it's correct, Erica tapped. And by the way, everybody, the plan's going to commence in thirty minutes.

Jayden sighed, literally 'tapping' into our conversation. Gotcha, Ice Queen.

Erica grimaced. Don't call me Ice Queen.

Thanks for telling me that, Jayden tapped back, smiling. Now I know how to annoy you.

Shut up, Erica said.  I haven't even punished you for earlier yet.

Jayden's finger froze in midair, and he shrunk. I won't call you that blasphemy of a name, mistress. Please forgive me.

Too late, Erica tapped, almost satisfactingly. I'll be there tomorrow night. Be prepared for pain.

Jayden trembled in fear. But, miss-

No 'buts'. If I say prepare for pain, then you prepare for pain.

Jayden sniffed. At least don't draw my blood.

Noted, I will, Erica tapped back. Thanks for the reccomendation.

If Jayden wasn't gay, then I'd be shipping you two, Trixie butted in. You play the perfect weak-husband to powerful-wife couple.

Hey, who are you calling weak? Jayden countered. 

She's calling you weak, Jayden, Dylan said. But I can argue against that. Trixie, you don't even know how to start a relationship. Meanwhile, Jayden's running the whole Wattpad comment section with ships.

True, Jayden said. Facts.

Shut it, Trixie tapped. You wouldn't know.

I think he does, Jayden tapped, grinning from ear to ear. After all, don't you have a-

ANYWAYS, Trixie spammed onto the floor. Erica, when was that plan going to commence?

In twenty-five minutes, now, Erica tapped. Get ready, all.

---TWENTY-FIVE MINUTES LATER---

"Guard, can I use the bathroom?" Erica said politely, virtually beginning phase one of our plan. "I've been holding it for three hours."

The guard scoffed. "You're Erica Hale. I've read your files, don't try to bluff at me. You've held yourself for nine days once in Tazmania."

"But guard," Erica whined. "Don't make me annoyed."

The guard hesitated. "Fine. But only for a minute."

"A minute!?" Erica shouted. "Do you not know how long it takes t- actually, never mind that. I'm not describing the process out loud."

"Go on," the guard waved to the door. "The minute's began."

Erica got out of here in a flash. After blinking, all I saw was a cloud of dust, and the second step of the plan began. Though this step was the most tedious one- especially since we had to wait at least three minutes.

After the patient time, the guard began to get annoyed. "I told her she only had three minutes!" he said. "I'm going to check on her."

"What!?" a female guard shouted. "I'm checking on her, Robert. Have you no sense of decency?"

Robert blushed and waved her aside. "Go on."

"Men these days," the woman spat, striding out of the room.