past mistakes

A New Pact

               Sunday, Monday and Tuesday were spent pretty much the same. Kendall and I would stay outside, playing tennis or swimming, and Prescott would occasionally join us, and we would watch a scary movie at night. They were very fun days, but I couldn't help but feel a weight on my chest because of Jack. He hasn't been home in days.

On Tuesday, I went to sleep at eleven, but was awoken in the middle of the night by the front door opening.
This isn't happening.

Fear is pulsing through my veins. I can't stop thinking about when I was little and I heard the same noise. I'm not that little girl again. I need to go see what it is.

I slowly get out of bed and creep to my door. I slowly open it, making sure that there are no creaking noises. As I am opening it, I hear someone coming upstairs. I peek out and see a figure walking closer, and as my eyes adjust to the darkness and can clearly see the hairline.

It's just Jack! Thank God!

I swing my door open quickly and meet him at the top of the stairs.

"Jack, you scared the hell out of me!" I whisper scream.

He doesn't say anything but I can tell that he is thinking that he wants me to get out of the way.

"Whatever I did, I'm sorry. I really am."

Jack stands there, refusing to make eye contact, for a while. Then he sighs, realizing that I am not moving until he answers, "How can you be sorry for something that you don't remember?"

I answer, "Exactly, just tell me what I should be sorry about."

"Until you figure that out, I'm done talking to you." he says then scoots me out of his way way too easily.

I panic and grab his arm to turn him around while saying, "Jack, I'm trying here!"

He turns quickly back around and kisses me passionately. I kiss him back. It lasts what feels like an eternity, but he pulls away and says, "Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't feel anything."

What does that have to do with anything?

I stare at him speechless, probably looking really dumb. I stutter, "I-I do, but, but I don't think we should act on it."

"Why? Because I'm a player? Because you led me on for weeks and somehow I'm still the player!" He shouts very angrily.

"What are you talking about? When did I lead you on? We are friends." I say shaking a little.

"This is how you act with your friends? Don't act like you didn't feel something too."

"But why did you leave? How are we supposed to talk about this if you don't answer my texts or come home?" I ask still shaking.

"Because I didn't want to talk to you Mary Cate."

I don't think I have ever heard him use my full name.

"But then you expect me to what? Go out with you? I don't understand what you want from me." I say, finally asking the right questions.

Jack doesn't hesitate when he shouts, "Yes! You are the prettiest, funniest, and most interesting girl I have ever met, obviously I want to go out with you. Even when I am walking you home when your drunk, I still like you. Even when I am mad at you, I still like you. You hurt me when you told me you didn't want to be with me. No one has ever done that before, I didn't know how to react."

I stand there in shock. That is not at all what I was expecting him to say. At all. How do I respond to that?

"I-I don't know what to say Jack. I like you, I do, but we're not good for each other. We fight way too much and I seem to always be drunk in your presence."

He interrupts, "You're not drunk right now."

I smile a little but continue on with my point, "I must have said something like this that night, but I don't think we should be together. Our friendship is too important."

Then he steps closer, "Give me a chance," then he kissed me abruptly. I pull away and say, "I can't do this."

"Come on Wendorf, give me a chance. If it ends badly, then we can avoid each other, if it ends because it wasn't meant to be, then we can go back to friends."

I release my stomach, realizing that I had been sucking in to not feel the butterflies as much. I think for a moment then I say, "I guess I have to since you have an unbreakable grip on my hands right now."

He looks down realizing how tightly he was squeezing my hands. He stops squeezing but doesn't stop holding them.

I see him smiling in the darkness. This might be a huge mistake, but who knows?

We also still have an issue that we need to resolve: Kendall. She doesn't even know about the kiss.