Storm's POV
I sat in the kitchen as I stared at nothing. It was about 12:01am and everyone was sleeping. I couldn't sleep because I had so much on my mind. My mother and I's conversation kept repeating itself in my head. "No Storm! You see this is your problem, you always try to control things but it gets out of hand! You always wait for the moment to fix things when it's to late! Just like the Don situation! Look how that situation resulted"
I felt a heavy feeling on my shoulders and chest. My mom was right. I always try to control everything but it never goes as planned. I waited to long to deal with D and it ended in getting Melo killed. The day he died, my life was no longer easy. It's only gotten worse and it still is. Sometimes I wish the roles were reversed and I wish it was me who got shot. When I think like that, I have to remember that I have kids, friends, and family who love me. Also an amazing husband who I'm so lucky to have.
But it's hard to not think those kind of thoughts when you have the whole world against you. It's like I can't breathe on my own. It's gets harder to breathe everyday.
As I looked down, I looked down at the matching tattoo Melo and I shared. I remember how excited he was to get it. I miss you so much LaMelo. In times like this I really need you. I need to hear you tell me what to do, or give me a uplifting speech, or maybe one of your amazing hugs. I could really use one of your hugs right now. Soon enough, I feel a tear fall from my eye, I instantly wipe it away.
"Don't cry Storm" I said to myself. It was hard, it was so hard not to cry. It was so hard keeping all of these emotions in and dealing with the stuff I deal with everyday. And the only person I wanted around to comfort me, isn't around. And will never be around me ever again. I closed my eyes as I breathed hard. The throbbing feeling in my chest and the memories I shared with Melo were floating around in my mind. Melo, come back to me.
"Why are you up?" I heard. I looked up to see Josh with his bag on his shoulder and a smoothie in his hand. Even at this time of night, he has a smoothie.
"Couldn't sleep. Where were you?" I asked him looking down.
"After training, I went to Caleb's house and chilled with him and Patrick. I texted you" He says walking up to me. My phone was dead, I honestly didn't feel like being on it. He puts his stuff down and stands in front of me. He lifts my face up and looks me in my eyes.
"What's wrong?" He asks softly.
"So much is wrong..." I said as my eyes got teary again. There was so much wrong...
"Do you wanna talk about it?" He says as he pulls the chair behind him and sits down.
"I wanna talk about some of it" I said to him. I didn't have the energy to say everything.
"Ok, talk and I'll listen" He says. I let out a shaky sigh and look down playing with my fingers.
"My shoot got canceled today because the brand no longer wanted to work with me. With all the things going on with me, I would've been a bad image for them" I said. He nods and looks at me.
"And how'd that make you feel?" He asks me.
"It made me feel angry. Since I've been back I've just been trying to get my life back and try to live normally. But everyone been making it so hard for me and I just can't take it anymore" I said shaking my head. He nods and then pulls me to him.
"It's frustrating isn't it?" He asks and I nod.
"Storm don't let this one brand get you tight because they don't wanna work with you. It's their lost, they lost an amazing model. Plus you got many other people who wanna work with you, so fuck them" He says and I nodded. He was right.
