Vanitas × Noé

Strangers

"We're strangers."

Noé's head started to spin the moment those words left Vanitas's mouth. It didn't make sense at all. He wished Vanitas would take it back, wished he'd never said it. But Noé knew that Vanitas meant it and that he would never take it back. Noé hated him in that moment because he didn't see Vanitas as a stranger, he saw him as a friend! Or at least he thought he saw him as a friend.

The stirring in his chest made him realise that wasn't quite right. Noé didn't want to acknowledge it but the pain he was feeling was all too familar. And he finally knew what it meant.

Back when Vanitas had told him he didn't want to be loved Noé had felt the same sensation, though less strongly. He had been heartbroken though he hadn't understood at the time. But now, now he was forced to see what had been there all along. He had fallen in love with with Vanitas and Vanitas had just broken his heart.

Noé wanted to vomit. To think that he had fallen for someone like Vanitas, that he still held some of that affection despite himself, it was all far too much. Because maybe Vanitas was right, maybe he didn't deserve love. He had proven to Noé in a matter of minutes that he was selfish and callous beyond imagination.

Vanitas had shown that he'd been using Noé all this time, that he didn't give a damn about him. That he didn't give a damn about Domi. And above all else that was unforgivable. Vanitas could stomp all over Noé's feelings but he claimed to be a vampire doctor, so why wouldn't he help her!? What was the point of him if he refused to save Domi?

Vanitas claimed to be a saviour but Noé saw that for the lie it was. In reality he was self-serving and cowardly. A loathsome, pitiful creature who would only fight for himself.

Noé still loved him but he hated him even more.

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Chapter 50 made me feel things so I wrote this. It's very short but I like it. I don't actually blame Vanitas for what went down that chapter but I also think that he did some inexcusable things. To be clear I don't think Noé handled things perfectly either. Basically, I feel bad for Vani but I just wish he responded better under stress. If he could just communicate better and stop closing himself off completely he'd have a much easier time. He really just barrelled onto the scene and made things 99% worse.

Jeanne, Noé and even Dante all obviously care about him and he clearly cares about them too and yet he insists on pretending that he doesn't. Just, ugh, this man needs to get better coping mechanisms.

It was very sexy of Mochijun to make them enemies right now though. I'm living for the drama of it.