Vanitas × Noé

After the End

Noé finally finished the sentence he had spent fifteen minutes pondering and dropped his quill. He pushed back his chair from the desk and rolled his shoulders before plodding across the room and retrieving some wine for himself.

He hadn't been much of a drinker before, alcohol never did taste as good as blood and he didn't like how fuzzy it made his thoughts, but now he almost always had some on hand. It wasn't that he was an alcoholic, it was just that he needed something after writing. He hadn't had blood since... he couldn't remember when. It just didn't seem right even if he still liked the taste. Vanitas was gone and he didn't really want anyone else's.

Funny, when he only did drink Vanitas's blood once. Noé could almost imagine the human laughing at him or calling him pathetic. It made him miss the vampire doctor more.

He enjoyed writing about their adventures, reliving the best parts and remembering how far they had come. It was a relief to have his feelings out in the open, even it was just on a page. But even as he recounted their exploits and how they laughed together and became friends he also had to put his worst memories down for it to make sense. Louis's death, which he had never fullt gotten over even to this day, the horrors of Doctor Moreau, Jean-jacques' memories that he was forced to witness and, of course, Vanitas's death.

He had yet to write that last one down. But every day it inched closer, that dreadful conclusion. Noé had mentioned it at the beginning because he needed to remind himself what was to come, that he was responsible for the death, but he was getting attached to the Vanitas he wrote about. At the point he was up to recounting, just after Gévaudan, Vanitas was still alive. Sometimes the memories in Noé's head would be so vivid that believing the man was gone was as difficult as the moment it had first happened.

So Noé took breaks and he drank. Vanitas deserved someone to record the tale but it was a slow process. Some days Noé could hardly get out of bed because of the things he had to remember and the details he had to summon to give an accurate account. After penning Louis's death he had spent an entire week listless, unable to work any more. He dreaded coming to the end and how long he would spend unable to think of anything else.

There was still so much more after Gévaudan. So much more pain and joy. Jeanne, Luca, Domi, Roalnd, everyone would appear more in later chapters. All would go through so much. He felt bad writing it down, almost as though he was putting them through the hardships again. He couldn't leave it rattling around his head either.

He had seen Jeanne and Vanitas's past through drinking their blood and that filled in some of the gaps in their tale he hadn't known before. If Jeanne knew he was recording it she would probably kill him. Vanitas too, though his threats were empty more often than not. Noé sighed as he found he reached the bottom of his glass and considered refilling it.

In the end he decided to drink a bit more before going to sleep. He went to his window and opened it, looking outside and looking at the moon. It wasn't a blue moon, thankfully, for if it was Noé was almost certain he would break down upon seeing it. He still liked the blue moon, it definitely made him sad but he didn't have any bad memories of it. It just made him lonely.

Noé swirled the wine in his hand, gazing into the liquid. It looked almost like blood in the dim lighting. Again he thought of Vanitas and how he would make fun of him for drinking. Noé imagined what he would say in that annoying, condescending voice of his.

You really can't live without me Noé, it's quite pathetic. You're like a dog pining for its owner.

Noé put the glass down then, though he hadn't finished. Nothing good ever came of him thinking so much about Vanitas. Trying to predict what the human would say if he were there always lead down the same path. He was doing so less frequently now but immediately after Vanitas died the voice had haunted him constantly. Clawing his way out of grief was hard enough without thinking how scornfully Vanitas would look at him in his current state.

So, Noé went to bed. He didn't bother changing most of his clothes, only taking off the least comfortable garments before throwing himself under the covers and clinging to his pillow. He drifted off with Vanitas's last words ringing in his mind, as they often did.

I won't die... Noé. Even if I'm no longer here...

---------------------------------------------------------

I had meant to put more speculation in this about how I think it will end/what will happen in the series but decided against it. I don't want to come back to this a few years later and groan at how dumb I was. I might still end up doing that even with just this.

As it stands the biggest thing I have 'predicted' (with 0 evidence) is that Noé will not only end up drinking Vanitas's blood but that he will also end up drinking Jeanne's blood at some point. I was originally going to try and predict who will die but I don't want to embarrass myself too much haha.

I hope you enjoyed. Sorry that Noé is drowning in sorrow and grief but that's how we roll in Jun Mochizuki's fandom.