Dazai: *dials 911*
Dazai: hey I hate to be "that guy" but I glued myself to the ceiling again.
---
Kenji: Welcome to my very first vlog in which I will try different hair products!
Kenji: *sprays the hairspray into their mouth*
Kenji: Well, right off the bat I can tell you that this one is not very good.
---
Higuchi: Pardon the intrusion, but-
Akutagawa: On this moment or just my life in general?
---
Atsushi: Look, let's just agree to say "I'm sorry" on the count of three.
Atsushi: One, two, three-
Atsushi:
Akutagawa:
Atsushi: See, now I'm just disappointed in both of us.
---
Dazai: You have to apologize to Atsushi.
Akutagawa: Fine.
Akutagawa: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.
---
*Poe and Ranpo skipping stones on lake*
Poe: It's such a beautiful evening.
Ranpo, whispering: Take that you fucking lake
---
Kouyou, banging on the door: Kyouka! Open up!
Kyouka: Well, it all started when I was a kid...
Chuuya: No, she meant-
Kouyou: Let her finish.
---
Chuuya: You're right.
Dazai: That's... That's an unusual phrase for you. Did you just learn it?
---
Atsushi: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so let's go for 12 more just in case.
Akutagawa: Atsushi, that's a coma.
Atsushi: Sounds festive.
---
Kyouka: Is having a penis fun?
Ranpo: It has its ups and downs.
Dazai: Sometimes it's a little hard.
Ranpo: It's a pain in the ass.
Kunikida: Oh, Jesus, fuck, guys, come on.
---
Ranpo: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.
Atsushi: The cow???
Ranpo: What?
Kunikida: Atsushi, W H Y?
---
Dazai: Chuuya and I are having a baby.
Atsushi: That's gre-
Dazai, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.
---
Atsushi: Just be yourself.
Dazai: 'Be myself'? Atsushi, I have one day to win Chuuya over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?
Ranpo: Couple weeks.
Yasano: Six months.
Kunikida: The jury's still out.
Dazai: See, Atsushi?
Dazai: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?
YOU ARE READING
Bungo Stray Dogs // Incorrect Quotes
FanfictionI will usually post 10-15 incorrect quotes per chapter. Hope you enjoy :) (ships are included, check the tags for them.)
