Bungo Stray Dogs // Incorrect Quotes

45

Dazai: This date is boring!
Kunikida: This isnt a date. I said I was going to the store.
Dazai: Then why did you invite me?
Kunikida: I didn't, I specifically said "dont come with me" then you said " fuck you Kunikida I'll do whatever I want!"

---

Akutagawa going clothes shopping with Chuuya: So, what do you think of this one?
Chuuya: I don't know. I'm not sure it's you, really.
Akutagawa: Good. I don't want to be me.

---

Lucy: Yesterday, I overheard Poe saying "Are you sure this is a good idea?" and Ranpo replying "Trust me," and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.

---

Akutagawa: I wasn't that drunk.
Atsushi: You colored my face with a highlighter because you said I was important.
Akutagawa: BECAUSE YOU ARE!

---

Kyouka, texting Atsushi: Atsushi there's a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it?
Kyouka: Pls hurry because I'm going to cry
Kyouka: Atsushi
Kyouka: Atsushi
Atsushi/Moth..?: Atsushi is dead. You're next. Love, Moth.

---

Chuuya: This is horrible! This is the most humiliating thing to ever happen to me!
Dazai: Oh-? Even more humiliating than-
Chuuya: We are not doing this!

---

Gin: H-how do you ask someone out?
Dazai: Well, first-
Chuuya: Don't ask them, they asked me out in a McDonalds parking lot.
Gin: ...And you said yes?

---

Dazai: We have a problem.
Kunikida: Let me guess, you caused it?
Chuuya: Gimme a sec, I'm not drunk enough to listen to this yet.
Kouyou: And it's another Tuesday, your point?
Atsushi: If you're mean the fire, that's our solution to last week's problem.

---

Hirotsu: You can't have a gun on stage!
Tachihara: WRONG AGAIN! I can have a gun, and I must have a gun, that's the rule of Chekhov's Gun: have a gun. And now that it's been seen, I will have to shoot someone before the end of the play.

---

Atsushi: I'm in love with you.
Akutagawa: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.
Atsushi: I know.
Akutagawa: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

---

Chuuya: Dazai, you do remember when we agreed we were better off as friends, right?
Dazai, naked in Chuuya's bed: No, I absolutely do not.
Chuuya, already taking off his clothes: Fuck... Me neither.

---

Dazai: Life is like Chuuya. It's short.

---

Chuuya: Dazai, I don't like you.
Dazai: What did you say?
Chuuya: You heard me!
Dazai, internally: I actually didn't hear what the fuck you just said.