Atsushi: Why aren't you sleeping?
Akutagawa: I'm too busy plotting your murder to sleep, Jinko.
Atsushi:
Akutagawa: ...The nightmares.
Atsushi: *wrapping their arms around Akutagawa* Awwww, sweetie-
---
Chuuya: I have no respect for Santa. Don't sneak in through the chimney and undermine my authority by bringing my family presents. Walk in through the front door and fight me like a man.
---
Dazai: If I say I love you, will you say it back?
Chuuya: Yes.
Dazai: I love you.
Chuuya: It back.
*Later*
Atsushi: Why is Dazai crying face-down on the floor?
---
Ranpo: Hey Poe?
Poe: Yeah?
Ranpo: What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false?
Poe:
Poe: ...What.
---
Chuuya: There's no way he likes me back.
Kouyou: Dazai would throw themself in front of a moving car for you.
Chuuya: Dazai would throw themself in front of a moving car for fun.
---
Ranpo: Yum, thanks!
Kidnapper: *puts more tape over their mouth* I said stop eating it.
---
Ranpo: Ah shit, I forgot.
Poe: Forgot what?
Ranpo: How do you expect me to answer that?
---
Akutagawa: Have I ever told you that you cook well?
Higuchi: Awww, no, you haven't!
Akutagawa: So why do you keep cooking?
---
Ranpo: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.
---
Akutagawa: *sees someone doing something stupid*
Akutagawa: What an idiot.
Akutagawa: *realizes it's Atsushi*
Akutagawa: Wait, that's MY idiot!
---
Akutagawa: I woke up and chose VIOLENCE. I WILL COMMIT ARSON AND BURN EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND!!! I AM ANGRY-
Atsushi: Awwww, you're so adorable! Give me a hug~
Akutagawa: Wh-What? nO, yOURE SUPPOSED TO BE SCARED OF ME! TREMBLE BEFORE MY WRATH-
Atsushi, recording: This is so cute.
---
Chuuya: Why do you let me win when we race up the stairs? You're the faster one.
Dazai: Erm... it's nice to see your smile when you win!
*later*
Chuuya: They're probably just staring at my ass, aren't they.
Akutagawa: Yeah, probably.
---
Chuuya: We need a plan to beat them.
Dazai: Okay, listen up. First, we fill their shoes with wet cat food.
Chuuya:
Dazai: Judge me all you want, I get results.
YOU ARE READING
Bungo Stray Dogs // Incorrect Quotes
FanfictionI will usually post 10-15 incorrect quotes per chapter. Hope you enjoy :) (ships are included, check the tags for them.)
