We were like characters in a romantic film trope. I fell in love; you did, too. And we lived happily ever after.
For a while, that was true. That was what I believed.
You were a total chic. How could you manage to look and smell good even after a whole tiring day at school with this tropical heat? Your hair, from natural locks, you let chemicals straighten your mane. You looked better with your new hair, I should admit. Dark brown looked fine, but alright, light brown was better.
I loved it when the wind blew your hair onto your face. You just stood still until it was over; then, you would always tuck some loose strands behind your ears. Did you ever notice I smiled every time that happened?
Your face, you looked lovely as ever. I'd bet all the other girls in school envied you. You wore makeup, which I hadn't the faintest idea why. I'd seen you bare-faced and you were still beautiful. I told you I loved you with or without makeup, but you just laughed and continued to manifest your artistry on your face, anyway. Did I ever tell you it didn't bother me every time we came late in events because of your effort on trying to look better?
People would always say I was lucky to have you. You were a complete package, they said. And I would always answer a smile because I was sure they didn't know you as much as I did. That was something I was proud of.
Did they know your singing would overwhelm people to the point that they'd choose to cover their ears with all their might? Such an entertainment to me, it was.
Did you know how similar your dancing and singing were? Honey, they were both out of tune, but that made you even more attractive to me.
I loved you for being you. You had your own share of flaws, but you didn't mind people noticing. Given the chance, I know you would even flaunt them.
But things changed. Your views changed. Your attitude changed. And worst? Your feelings for me changed.
Here came the conflict in our story. This was where it'd get all cliché.
Our relationship went on and off. You were as irascible as you could ever be. You began drinking like you were swimming in a pool of booze. You began flirting with men in clubs, my friends told me. I didn't know what I did which made you do those things, but I was truly sorry. I am sorry.
Honey, please come back. Please be here with me again. Do we still have the chance to get back together?
I think I have to take back what I've said. We are not a trope. We are not another Disney princess story. And one thing to attest to that is, I'm the only one who gets our story going.
You're gone. You've left me hanging. I feel betrayed by you. I've thought our breakup is justified, but no. And it can never be. You're so selfish. Do you think changing and breaking up with me would be less of a pain than knowing my love is leaving me sooner than our tomorrow?
Remember that time when you were mad at me just because when you asked me, "Till when will you love me?” I answered, "Until tomorrow". You walked out of the movie theater while I was left dumbfounded for a moment. Man, that was a great film, but I didn't finish it because I feared my tomorrow with you might not come.
For a couple of minutes, I thought I'd I lost you. That you'd gone home by yourself. Until I'd reached your favorite ice cream shop. Man, I'd pay a gazillion tickets just so I could have a rerun of your cute little face while you ate your ice cream like you didn't like it. Did I ever tell you how dazzling you were when you frown and act so childish?
I grabbed my own chair so I could sit beside you. "Until tomorrow," I repeated, and you didn't bother to look at me. I continued. "Forever is a supposition, a hyperbole. No one has proved its existence. No one even knows when it begins.
"Everything is made to end. It's inevitable. I don't want to settle for the uncertain. If I promised you 'forever', I'm not sure I could hold onto it. I want certainty. Like I love you certainly. And at the moment, 'tomorrow' is more certain than 'forever'. I can attest that there comes tomorrow. It has its end, but for as long as we live, we know tomorrow is to come. For as long as we live, tomorrow moves forward. We aim for it each and every day.
"Tomorrow is tricky. You know it's just hours away, but when the clock goes 00:00, it's not tomorrow, anymore; it's called today. You have to wait another 24 hours for tomorrow to come. But the cycle goes on. You never reach it until something ends it for you."
Your tomorrow with me is ended. Your last words to me were, "Until tomorrow." You smiled before tears rolled down from your closed eyes. You never let me say a few more words.
Now, here I am, sitting beside you, thinking what could've been had you not left. Your name would've looked better with my last name. You could've waited, you know.
How can I look forward to tomorrow when I know you won't be there? I've always thought of ending tomorrow, but my promise to you keeps me alive. If I end my life now, my promise to love you until tomorrow ends with it. It'd look like I stopped loving you, that I got tired loving someone who's long gone. The thought breaks me even more. So, I continue.
I continue to looking forward my tomorrow's end. The moment when our story finally ends.
