My best friend-lovers (a One Direction lovestory) - COMPLETED

Chapter 38 "It's easier to stay strong if nobody knows how you are feeling."

--- Chapter 38, soon it's Chapter 40 and I'll have to orate again,woohooo...

Anyways,hope you're gonna like this chapter :)

Don't forget to vote,fan and comment - I won't update again without feedback ;) ---

* Anny's POV *

"Could you all please  leave me and Anny alone for a while ?" Louis asked,smiling weakly.Some tears were still rolling down his cheeks.The others mumbled something but then they left.Jason and Harry hesitated the most.Understandable.

"What do you want to talk about Louis ?!" I asked desperately.He looked at me,a hurt expression on his usually happy face.His eyes were red and watery,he looked as bad as I was feeling.

Through the whole time I was spending with the boys,the whole time I was telling this story,I was hiding my feelings.Even from myself.I was pretending it was okay.

"What were your other problems,love ?" he asked caringly.He put a hand on my thigh,looking directly in my eyes.I thought for a second,but then I realised,if I wouldn't tell him,the situation would get even worse.If that was possible.

"When you were gone ... well at first I was just feeling a bit alone,so I tried to occupy myself.You know,I didn't have that much friends.Just you,Jane and Belle.I got on well with some girls from school,but they had moved away.And getting to know people has always been hard for me,you know ? And Jane and Belle,they couldn't just fly over to here whenever I was feeling bad... I learned how to cook,how to play the guitar,just so that I had something to do.Something that kept me away from hurting myself.Of course I was still busy with studying but my free time was horribly lonely." I began.

"Oh love,I'm so,so,so sorry..." he muttered.

"You haven't even heard the whole story Louis." I answered drily.

"You were gone for a long time,you didn't even call very often.We didn't skype once.I knew you were busy,I knew you didn't have the time to,but I just felt kind of worthless... Whatever.After some time I went to a dancing school,hoping for some preoccupation.I booked a basic class and my teacher surprisingly was somebody I knew and hadn't seen in a long time.Jason... I already told you that.I told you that we just got along very well and met a few times,right ? Wrong."

"W-what do you mean,Anny ?"

"One time,we met for a coffee.Oh,I started to drink it because of sleeping problems.I couldn't sleep at night,but I didn't want to be so tired all the time,so I started to drink large amounts of coffee.Do you know how horrible it is to lay awake at night,awful thoughts all over your mind ? Nevermind... After we drank the coffee and talked for a while,I said I wanted to go home.He offered to walk me there,I accepted.As we reached my house,I said goodbye to him.I closed the door behind myself and broke down to the floor like I had done a lot of times."

"Oh my god ! Anny,why-why didn't you tell me earlier ?"

"Because I just couldn't Louis... Let me finish.But when I broke down,Jason was still standing infront of my door,he heard me crying and sobbing.He asked me to open the door and I did.He knew I was in there,not opening the door would have made him worry even more ... After I opened the door,he just hugged me,telling me everything was going to be okay.The following days he was there for me every day.Oh and if you want to know it,he never tried anything on me." I snapped.

"Why were you so surprised to see him then ?"

"Because he brought back those memories.I came here to have a fun time,I didn't want to be reminded.Do you understand what I mean ? I didn't want to get depressive again." I asked him.