From Grief We grew (Only On Wattpad)

Chapter 11 Teagan

Sometimes the right thing is what we fear the most to do. 

   I read the quote Lucah sent one last time before I shove my phone into my pocket and leave the room. I join my dad at the dining table and wish my parents good morning. "Going somewhere?" He asks, looking up from his newspaper. I put a spoon full of Cheerios in my mouth and look at him. "Yej, I'm goming ouj with Haygen." My words come out jumbled up.

   "Eat and speak Teagan," my dad advises, shaking his head. So I nod, swallow and repeat myself, "Sorry. I said I'm going out with Hayden." My dad looks shocked but I don't blame him. I haven't visited the Fenwicks for a year now.

   "Oh, that's good. Yes, definitely good. Are you going out for his birthday?" That's when it hits me. It's the twin's birthday! How can I forget? I stand up abruptly.
 
   "What happened?" My dad asks.
 
   "I uhm gotta go," I say and grab my backpack and leave. I drive to Walmart and pick up a pack of black fine liners and a pack of skin colour pencils. I get them wrapped up with gift paper and a bow before I go to Hayden's house.

   I walk up to the door and ring the doorbell. Katherine opens it and is shocked to see me. "Teagan?"

   "Yes. Hello Katherine," I say and quickly hug her. It takes her a minute to realize that I'm really here and for her to hug me. "C'mon in!" She welcomes me in with a big smile.

   "Hope, see who's come!" Hope turns around at the sound of her mother's voice. She jumps down the couch and runs up to me screaming, "Teeeeeee you here!" in excitement. I carry her on my hips and kiss her cheeks.

   "Where are Bubba and Hay?" I ask Katherine.

   "Noah's gone to work. Hayden is in his room. Would you like some juice?"

   "No thank you. I just had breakfast. I'll go upstairs."

   Katherine takes Hope from me. "Nooo mum lemme go with T," she whines. Her mother tells her I'll be back and she nods. I excuse myself and go upstairs. Though I intend to go to Hayden's room, I find myself in front of the white door. My hands tremble as I reach for the doorknob. Suddenly this place feels hot and it gets harder to breathe. I twist the know and open the door. Close the door!! Something inside of me yells but I do the opposite. I slowly stroll inside and look around. Everything is as it is. I sit on his bed and let out a deep sigh. I wipe my sweating palms on my pants and grab his pillow. I hold it tight to my chest and close my eyes as I bite my teeth. Tears roll down my cheeks and I hug it tighter. The pillow still smells like him. It's like he never left.
 
   "Hey... oh, I'm sorry."
 
   I open my eyes and see the boy I love dearly standing by the doorframe. But it only takes me a few seconds to blink and realize it's Hayden with Zayden's glasses. He walks inside and hugs me. I wrap my arms around his torso and whisper, "I miss him."
 
   "Me too." He pats my back.
 
   I try my best not to break down but the smell of the pillow that's in between us makes it hard. So I quickly pull away and put the pillow on the bed. I wipe my cheeks and take out his present from my bag. I give it to him while I say, "Happy Birthday."

   He sits beside me and opens it. "I didn't know what to get-" he cuts me off by hugging me and saying, "Thank you. I actually needed these." I smile and nod.
 
   Then there is silence. Hayden empties the box of pencils on the bed and investigates them. I stare at the painting on the wall. It's a portrait of their mum that Zay painted.
 
   "So... coming... me?"
 
   "Hmm?" I look at him, not quite catching what he said.
 
   "Are you coming with me on the trip?" He asked looking up the pencils.

   "I changed my mind," I simply say, still staring at the painting.

   "Good."

   "Why are you wearing those glasses?" I turn my head to look at him.