GOTHAM X READERS

[JONATHAN CRANE DRABBLE]

Prompt: "Everything is okay now, I'm here, I'm here." and "Can I hug you?"

Warnings: angst but ends in a fluffish setting!

Word count: 1.5k

You would have never believed that your father would go that far, sure he was obsessed with "curing" you all from fear but you never knew it was this bad. Now your father was dead and brother was hallucinating all the time.

He saw scarecrows wherever he looked - attacking him, eating him alive and he was attacked again and again, passing out from fear sometimes and then going over the same process. You looked at him laying there, him not even recognizing you and a tear rolled down your cheek. You tried to hold his hand, but he just screamed "no!" and you let go of him. He saw you as a scarecrow too. You tried to talk to him, snap him out from his fears, but the fear toxin was too strong.

"Hey, Jonathan. It's me, Y/N. Everything is okay now, I'm here, I'm here." you grabbed his hand once again and brought your other hand to his cheek, trying your best to hold on even when he tried to make you let go. "It's okay. I'm here, it can't hurt you."

That seemed to do it momentarily, he stopped wriggling around and you could see how the doctor and the police officer stopped in their tracks to stare at the scene in wonder.

"Y/N...?" he muttered and swallowed, quickly glancing to his side and flinched violently.

"I'm here. It can't hurt you now." you smiled sadly at him.

"It's following me, why anyone doesn't do anything?" he let out a whimper as he saw the scarecrow from the corner of his eye again. You gave his hand a squeeze and he immediately returned it, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment.

"It's not going to do anything to you now. I'll keep you safe." you ran your thumb across his knuckles. "I'll help you with getting better. It's going to be alright."

He stared at you for a moment, before he muttered, "Can I..." he closed his eyes as a scarecrow appeared behind your back. "Can I hug you?"

You answered with pulling him to your embrace. He shook against you, he was scared and alone inside his head, but he was happy to notice that there was one person left from his family who would never leave him - and you were ready to prove it.

---

♦ TWO YEARS LATER ♦

---

It was all your fault.

You should have tried harder, insisted on seeing your brother, hell, even punch Reed, force him to let you take Jonathan home. His time at the Asylum hadn't made him any better, he had told you that he got ice baths and electric shocks, but not any therapy or aid to help him cope with his immense fears. You could only talk to him through short phone calls once a month, him crying on how much he wanted to see you, and you were feeling helpless when you couldn't hold him, take an eye contact, smile at him comfortingly, tell him that everything would be alright. You couldn't be there for him. You had promised you would help him to get better, but you had failed to keep your promise.

And now he was unrecognizable. He had become his fear, he wasn't your brother anymore. You had been there, screaming your lungs out at Reed upon learning he had let him out without you, he claimed he had driven him on the streets all alone, when your brother came in. He didn't even glance at you when you screamed and shielded yourself against the wall, you didn't know it was Jonathan. You just saw some maniac with a scythe, dragging it against the tables, sending sparks from the friction. Someone who was ready to kill.

It was only when he started to speak, when he started telling Reed how he got only ice baths and electric shocks and how he cured his fear - you realized it was indeed your brother. His voice was distorted, monotonous, scary, but he told Reed things your brother had told you numerous times during phone calls. You didn't know where he came from, why he looked like that, but at that moment you didn't care. He was alive.

He didn't see you as you stood in the dark corner of Reed's office, and you weren't sure if he had even noticed you were there. You watched as Reed tried to kill Jonathan, a scream escaped your lips upon a flash of fear of losing him anyway - but he was ready for it and gassed Reed, making the man scream and squirm against the wall.

You identified the symptoms - Jonathan used your father's fear toxin to have revenge on Reed. He watched as Reed scrambled away from the office, gun in his hand and you finally approached your brother cautiously. You knew he wasn't who you knew him to be anymore. Your father had triggered it, but you had caused it by not being successful in demanding your right to have Jonathan living with you. You were an adult, and he was just a boy. Underage. You were legally his caretaker, and if you had known about your rights, you could have threatened Reed with going to court if he didn't let you take Jonathan home, you had realized it too late. He had lied to you, that you didn't have rights because Jonathan was dangerous to society. He wasn't a lunatic who was killing everyone he saw, he was afraid of everything, and being at the Asylum just made it worse. You could have helped him.

But you had realized it too late - and now your brother was gone.

He slowly turned his head towards you when you approached him, and you felt tears making their way towards your eyes. But you had to hold them back. You had to remain strong. He couldn't see how broken you were for not doing enough. You made an eye contact and offered him a shaky smile.

"Hi, Jonathan." you whispered, and his shoulders slumped a bit as he recognized you.

Silence ensued, and you turned your gaze to your feet. You tried to ready yourself for being berated by Jonathan, him telling you how bitter he was when you didn't do enough - but then it didn't come. He just stared at you for a while, and then shook his head.

"I know what you're thinking. Reed always told me that you don't care. That you have abandoned me, knowing I could never get better. And for a while, I believed it." he began, turning his head to glance towards the direction of gunshots and screams. "But after I found myself... I finally realized that he had manipulated me. All those phone calls, you never failed calling me. If you didn't care, you wouldn't have called. That was one reason for making him fear like he made me fear of losing you."

You were a bit surprised about him not being mad at you. You had been mad at yourself for months, years, knowing your brother suffered and you weren't able to help. You had continuously pushed yourself to try harder, but it never helped. Reed knew his way around your arguments, making you believe you couldn't do anything about Jonathan's state, that you didn't have rights over him, until it was too late to fix it.

You reached towards his hand, taking a hold of it and smiled at him sadly. He didn't react to it at first, but then he slowly wrapped his fingers around yours.

"I know you've always been there for me, Y/N. You've struggled to make your way to me. None of this is your fault. This is just who I am now." he spoke in a monotonous voice, without much emotion, but you could still hear him behind it all.

And for Jonathan, seeing you, feeling you holding his hand and showing love - just for a moment, he felt like a child again. Like that same child he was when everything was well. When your mother was alive, and you all could just be a happy family. He forgot his will to have revenge, to turn all of Gotham into their fears - because with you, he could be that person he had been growing to be before the fire.

You had always been the only one who was standing up for him, shielding him from your father, refusing to let him use your brother as a test subject. He loved you both and wanted only the best for you, but he never understood that fear was one of the things keeping you all alive. Your father had died because of being fearless, careless. He had turned Jonathan into a villain just before his death, but the bond you two had would never be broken. You had swore it to Jonathan a long time ago, and you still intended keeping that promise.

He didn't need your protection anymore, but you'd never let anyone take him away from you again. You would always come back to him. It was a new promise, and this time you wouldn't let anyone take it away from you.