The Bachelors: a tiktok story

136: Recess

When you walked out into the hallway, you didn't see Josh but made eye contact with Chase right away. He wasted no time in approaching you.

Chase: "This seems to be going really fast."

You: "It's only the pre-trial."

Chase: "What's the difference?"

You: "Well, according to the prosecutor in there, it's basically where both sides present the basis of their cases so the judge can decide what if anything a jury would be allowed to hear if it even comes to that."

Chase: "Do you think it's going to go to trial? They won't just let him go with all of that evidence will they?"

You shrugged and Chase hugged you before asking:
"Are you ready to get up in front of everyone and tell your story?"

You: "Honestly? No."

Chase: "I don't know what that attorney's problem is. What kind of monster defends someone who's done those things?"

You looked over at the defense attorney who was standing near the tall doors to the courtroom, waiting to be the first in line to get back in. Noah was nowhere to be seen. Chase motioned at the doors and offered:
"I think they keep people that are technically in custody in a private room when the court isn't in session."

You: "Huh?"

Chase: "Noah. I don't think he will come out here. I saw it on TV somewhere before. They don't let the inmates mingle with the general public, much less the victims. He isn't coming out here so try to relax a little. You still have a rough afternoon ahead of you."

Emma walked up and handed you a cup of water:
"Hey, sweetie. How are you holding up?"

Emma: "Anything, hun. What's up?"

You: "If I turn and look at you, I need you to take Jaden, Bryce, and Josh and leave the courtroom."

Emma stumbled over her words but ultimately agreed:
"Yes. The answer is yes, I'm sorry. Whatever you need me to do, that's what I promised and that's what I'm going to do."

She hugged you before walking over to where Bryce stood to give you and Chase a chance to finish your talk. He looked around in confusion like he was doing a complicated math equation in his head:
"Everyone but me?"

You: "You were there. You lived through it with me. I don't think I could do it alone. I need you there."

Chase: "But Josh... he's-"

You cut him off:
"I don't want him to think differently of me if he hears certain details. Please, just promise me you'll stay and make sure they leave if I give the signal."

Madi and Lauren were talking with their own families so you just walked past them. It felt so weird to approach them even though you'd been talking in the courtroom and especially since you'd just listened to them give such intimate details about what you could only imagine was the worst experience of their lives. You smiled, awkwardly before passing by because your attention was zoned in behind them anyway. There, Nessa sat alone on a bench similar to the one you'd seen her and Josh talking on the day of the deposition.

You handed Chase your empty cup who immediately understood not to follow further. He lagged back as you approached her: "Are you okay?"

Nessa shivered and rubbed her hands along her bare arms. She was dressed so much differently than you were used to, modest with barely any makeup. She was still the most beautiful person in the room though.

You motioned to your Mom stumbled over herself to walk over, quickly: "What can I do, sweetie?"

You: "Do you think you could run to the vending machine and get Nessa a coffee to warm her up?"

Your mom was so eager to help any way you'd let her so she rushed off without a pause for hesitation. You sat next to her, and exhaled the words: "Can I ask you a question?"

She nodded as you worked up the nerve to ask:
"Why did you let me think you were with Josh or at least talking to Josh this whole time?"

Nessa: "Honestly? I was trying to make you crazy."

You were shocked by her honesty. She could have said any one of a dozen ridiculous reasons and you'd have believed her. The truth somehow more than a little hurt even though her answer wasn't all that unexpected.

You: "Wow. You must really hate me."

Nessa: "I don't really hate anyone really. I've been through a lot in my life. More than most and I just happen to know first hand that life is too short to waste time on hatred."

You didn't mean to say it out loud but heard the next words ring in the air regardless: "But not too short to waste it on torture?"

You shocked even yourself but Nessa just smiled and relented: "That's a fair point."

She continued: "Ive never had anyone really in my life before Josh. He became my family and then after Noah, it all just went away."

You didn't want to ask what happened with Noah bc you knew it'd come out soon anyway.

Your mom handed Nessa the cup and she sipped it with a smile. You could tell that it brought her a little comfort to have a Mom taking care of her when she was feeling so lost. Josh had told you about her losing her parents as a teenager but you didn't dare say anything in case he wasn't supposed to.

You offered:
"Why don't I go grab us a bite to eat. Mom, will you show me where the vending machines are?"

You motioned for Emma who instantly understood and dragged the whole gang over to keep Nessa company. Emma's friendship had become such a source of comfort lately. You could count on her to be whatever you needed without a moment's notice. A fighter, advice, comfort, cheering up, a favor, backup... it didn't matter. She just always came through.

When you turned the corner into the room where the vending machines were kept, you saw Josh standing in the corner trying to decide which chips to get. Your pulse quickened and you froze in place. Your fight or flight response was still processing as you Mom nudged you forward. She handed you $10 and hugged you before making her quick exit: "I'm going to let you handle things from here. I'll go check on your friend."

You nervously put the dollars into the machine as you tried to watch him without looking. The last thing you wanted was to make eye contact before you'd had a chance to decide what you would say if he spoke to you. You quickly selected 2 premade sandwiches only to watch them get stuck halfway. You really couldn't believe your luck.

Josh appeared behind you and as you felt him breathing down your neck, your breathing became even more shallow. You were afraid of making any move that might make him step back. You'd only been apart less than a week but you found yourself craving his presence so desperately that'd you'd have done just about anything in that moment to hold onto the closeness. He reached around you and used his strength to shake the machine, freeing your sandwiches as you watched them tumble to the opening. You thanked him, awkwardly.

Josh: "Are you nervou-"

You cut him off to blurt out the question weighing on your mind:
"What are you doing here Josh?"

Josh: "Isn't it obvious? I'm here for you."

You felt your heart almost leap out of your chest as you tried your best to keep a cool exterior.

Josh: "Can I come over later tonight and maybe we can talk?"

You nodded then rushed back to give Nessa her sandwich before the judge called everyone back into session.