I am stronger than I thought
But weaker too
I found myself crying, trying to stop
Begging to be given a moment to gather my thoughts
Because even in my moments of weakness, I beg for forgiveness
Because of the shame I've been taught to feel
Even now, I realize just how indoctrinated I am
So maybe now, before I lose the chance I'll say this now
You need to hang on
Not for anyone else, but yourself now
You come first, even if it feels selfish
It's funny, patting yourself on the back
Thinking you unlearned your sense of obligation and duty
It's a beautiful thing, yes
But you are not free
You never will be, so long as you allow guilt to control your life
Your choices never truly yours, if you can't free yourself of burden
At what cost of your sanity to maintain your illusion
As it slowly becomes an unfulfilled delusion
Bonds by family, or by choice
They cannot be equal, no
And family is our own definition, our own findings
Yet what can't you see in the truth that is blinding
You have to hold on, with the fleeting strength that you have
With every last ounce of resolve you can still find
Because the second you let go
You may never be able climb back up again
You spent too many years trying to
Not for it all to slip away again,no
You need to, you have to
Because you won't ever be yourself again if you don't
Shouldering your burdens
I know how much you struggle
How much pain you're in
And yet, you persist
I cannot say I'm proud of you any longer
Rather, I mourn for you
Because this is no way to live
And no way to die
You're beginning to see more,and I know why
You feel as if your life has gone by
Not knowing what direction
Knowing your mind offers you no protection
So you can't run, and maybe you can't hide
From all those feelings welling up inside
Do not fight them, but embrace them
Even in pain, we will walk, limp forward
Because when our reaper pays us a visit
You may not be the bravest, or the most strong
But he will shake his head when you feel you did wrong
You did the best with what you had, and so rest
Lay your head down to sleep
Sleeping knowing this:
No matter what happens, no matter what comes
Your are greater than the whole, and the nightmare's sum
