Nowhere Fast | Eminem Fan Fiction [Completed]

04

TW: Postpartum Depression

Avery POV
A Couple Weeks Later - Early April 

Life was adjusting back to normal, for the most part. Marshall was back in his routine of going to the studio and Tatum and I were working from home. But as much as I loved being a mom, it didn't feel like I thought it would. 

I was angry most of the time, I could cry at any given minute over the smallest shit. My anxiety and the exhaustion were completely taking over. Not to mention it felt like everyone watched, my every move as a mother. And most of the time, I hid this from everyone. 

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I let out a small smile as I looked over from my computer to see Tatum, but before I could start typing again I couldn't help but be distracted by her. I quickly grabbed my phone and snagged a few pictures of her before she poked her lip out, letting out a few whimpers. 

I sighed, as I got settled on the couch as Tatum's soft cries were hushed as she started to take her bottle. "Good girl" I said as I caressed her skin softly, as my phone started to ring and Sam's name came across the screen. "Hello?" I said softly. 

"Hey, how's it going this morning?" she asked. "Okay" I said, being short. Sam cleared her throat, "everything okay?" she asked as her tone quickly changed. "Nothing, just tired" I said giving her another short response, as I closed my eyes and put my head back. "Avery James, come on, I know you better than that" she said, "what's going on?" she persisted. 

"I don't know Sam, I'm sure it's nothing" I said, trying to disregard the whole thing. "Avery, talk to me" she said sternly as I let out a deep sigh. 

"I'm just exhausted, and my anxiety is through the roof" I said, "and I feel like everyone has something to say about Tatum, and about Marshall and I. And about what I'm doing as a new mom" 

"And I cry all the time, and I'm just angry for no fucking reason" I said as I just continued to ramble, "and I don't know, I just feel so lonely" I said as the tears started to fall uncontrollably. 

"Woah, woah woah, Av" Sam said as she tried to calm me down, "does Marshall know all this?" she asked softly. "I cannot see Marshall, or the girls, continuing to let you feel like that or let you feel like you're struggling" she said before there was silence. 

"Avery, don't make me get on place to Michigan" she said as I let out a sigh, "you're scaring me right now, Av" 

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Marshall POV

I leaned back from the sound board, reaching into my pocket as my phone started to vibrate. I grabbed it, seeing Samantha's name across the screen, "hello?" I said as I answered the call. 

"Hey, you uh, you got a minute to talk?" she asked, as I noticed her tone was more serious. I cleared my throat, "what's going on?" I asked as I stepped out of the studio. "I just got off the phone with Avery, and something's not right" 

I furrowed my eyebrows, "what do you mean, did she say something?" I asked. "She didn't seem like herself, she was rambling alot. She also didn't wanna talk, until I pushed her to her breaking point" 

"What did she say?" I asked softly. "She talked about the exhaustion which is to be expected" she said as I nodded, "but she also talked about anxiety, and feeling like she's being watched with every move she makes" 

"She also said she's angry, and cries all the time. And that she feels lonely" she said as I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. I sighed, "Avery has never expressed any of this to me" I said softly. "There could be a number of things on her mind, Marshall" Sam said as I ran my hands over my face. 

"Maybe she's homesick, having a baby is a big deal and she didn't have her family or friends there" Sam said cautiously. "I told her there was no way you, or your girls, or your brother or anyone in your inner circle for that matter would continue to let her feel like that, if they knew" she said softly. I let out a small chuckle, "thanks for sticking up or me"

"Marshall, the love you have for Avery goes beyond what I have ever seen for anyone, so what she was saying just didn't really make sense. Also, someone doesn't have to tell you something more than once before you try to resolve the issue as quick as possible, so if you knew we wouldn't be having this conversation"

I pressed my tongue to my cheek, "maybe it's cause I've been in the studio?" I asked. "Listen if anyone understands a workaholic better, its her" Sam said as she let out a small laugh. "I don't know, I have a wife and a new baby at home" I said as I shrugged. 

I cleared my throat, "I don't know, maybe I should have waited before coming back to the studio" I said, "maybe Avery needs me at home"

"Years ago, working all the time was a price to pay because I missed out on so much with my girls, and I- I don't want to miss what I missed with my other girls. I never intended to make Avery feel like this"

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Avery POV

I sighed as I glanced at the baby monitor, than back over at my computer before putting my head in my hands. I was physically and emotionally drained, and seconds away from bursting into tears.  

I heard the lock of the front door turn, before I quickly cleared my throat trying to pull myself together as I heard Marshall's footsteps down the hallway. I looked up seeing there were flowers in his hand, but no words were exchanged. He set the flowers down on the counter and pulled me into him, before he pressed his lips to my skin. I sighed, as I tried to swallowed the lump caught in my throat as I gently pulled away before fumbling with the flower petals.

"Baby, tell me what's bothering you so I can fix it"

Nothing was said. 

"Is is Michigan, do you not wanna be here anymore?"

Again, nothing was said. 

He shook his head, "did you really tell Samantha you felt alone, that you cry all the time?" he asked cautiously as tears started to well up in my eyes. I looked down knowing that was more than enough of an answer for Marshall. 

He quickly pulled me into him as tight as he could, "Avery, baby, my love and respect goes so beyond for you its insane" he said as he wiped the wetness from my cheeks. "I'm sorry if I just jumped back into going to the studio, when you really need me here" 

"I just want to be able to give you and Tatum everything, but not at the price of your sanity" he said softly, "I never intended to make you feel any sort of way" he said as he ran his fingers through my tangled curls. 

The silence still lingered. 

He sighed, "is it because your family, or Sam wasn't here when Tatum was born?" he asked as him and I made eye contact. "Baby, I don't want to play twenty questions" he said as his fingers caressed my skin, "tell me what is is so I can fix it" 

"Marsh" I said barely above a whisper as he took my hand in his, bring it up to his lips as he kissed it softly. "Pack whatever you and the baby need, we're going to Texas"