Chatbox thoughts

I am angry

Jealousy is running high today. I honestly get so jealous that I want to destroy things. I want to burn down the town and make people hurt.

I had a discussion with my youth pastor today and I said that I have dealt with my anger and he gave me the face of "Uhhhhh...yeah I don't think so."

I didn't say I was perfect or that I didn't get angry I said I dealt with it.

But honestly, I see pictures of People graduating and going to prom and It sucks because my prom got canceled. But wtf can I do? nothing is going to make me feel better.

 I was hoping to drown my problems in Moon Knight but I got logged out of Disney + and nobody is helping me. Honestly, I want to beat people and make them listen to me sometimes.

all I can say is that I am angry at my school for canceling prom, my dad for not asking for the password, and My youth pastor for doubling back on his word and not accepting that some people do not need to hear a 6-week discussion on the same point.

yesterday I was angry at my mom for not trusting me. She doesn't trust me. She doesn't trust me to run my business, so doesn't trust me to manage my time, and she doesn't trust me to manage my resources. She doesn't understand that I am going to be an adult. 

18 is going to suck. a lot

I am half considering going into a screaming match and leaving

I won't But I want to. I want to make them bleed.

now I am going to go clear this up with God because this needs to be out of my system before I approach him.