Burn for You

26

Serena
I continued to sob as papa let me go and I saw Grayson's eyes widen at the sight of me. Though it had only been a few minutes since he was last out here, I was completely different.

He rushed over to me, the sound of his heart beating almost audible. "What happened, Flower?"

I sobbed harder at the sound of the nickname I loved so much. Why would he say something I don't understand and then act like this?

"I'll come back to check on you."

"Serena, tell me what's wrong." His voice was soft as he brushed his knuckles against my cheek. "Did I say something you didn't like?"

I managed to nod my head as I tried my best to speak.  "I don't understand."

He hummed. "What don't you understand baby?" He said the pet name is if he was comforting a child, not a hint of indifference or romantic affection.

His eyes softened as he held my face in his hand, the other squeezing mine gently.

"'We're done." I sobbed, my words muffled.

He chuckled softly, a breath escaping his lips as if he was the one confused and I just cleared something up for him...The way things are going right now, I guess that would be the case.

"I didn't mean that 'we' are done, flower. I meant that 'we' were done talking. I'm sorry I confused you."

My sobs instantly stopped as if they were realizing how stupid I was too until quickly resuming when I realized how stupid I am.

He laughed as he lifted himself, holding me by my arms as he lifted me out of my chair and onto my feet.

"I'm so dumb." I sobbed as I held onto his waist.

His chest vibrated as he laughed a cheerful and wholehearted laugh. "You're not dumb, Serena. You were just confused. My tone did not help you to understand either so I'm sorry, okay?"

I nodded as my sobs calmed down, holding him tighter each time I hit a wave of embarrassment that wanted to knock me back into tears.

We stood there for a moment as he swayed softly, holding my body close to his as he drew circles in my back with his palm.

"Are you ok?" He muttered before placing a kiss on my crown.

"...yes, I'm sorry. That was stupid of me."

He chuckled lightly. "No, it's ok. Don't apologize." He placed another kiss on my hair. "Besides I-"

A loud siren rang through the station, Grayson sighing and quickly letting me go.

"I'll see you later, Flower." He held the back of my head as he kissed my forehead and ran off after his coworkers who erupted out of the other room.

I sighed and placed my head in my hands. "That's so embarrassing."

...

The next day, after burning the night from my memory, I went to my meeting. But I regretted it when I showed up and saw the little beater boy.

And hey, since it's already bad, let's make it worse! We were also asked to, instead of telling our story of getting clean, tell our story of how we became addicts. Definitely not volunteering.

"Good morning everyone."

I avoided her stare as I mumbled a reply back. I know I'm usually happier when I'm nervous so it doesn't seem like I'm nervous but I'm not nervous right now. I'm slightly upset and very irritated about bruiser boys' glares that are coming my way.

I glanced over at him to see him still burning holes into my temple, a still bruised nose, a lightly blacked eye, and little scabs littering his face.

I will not lie, it was very satisfying to see, and to think that I did that? Crazy. I felt like an artist viewing his best-selling piece for the first time.

"So who would like to share first? I know this topic can be worse than discussing the addiction for some but I would like you all to know that we are not judging you here. You are free to speak and tell your story."

It was silent, her sweet small never faltering despite the obvious hesitance to say anything coming from everybody in the room.

"Fine. I'll go." Alissa raised her hand as she crossed her legs, all eyes now on her. "It's a very boring and out-of-the-book story ok?"

She sighed, leaning back into her seat. "Hi, my name is Alissa."

"Hi, Alissa." We chanted.

"I'm 24 and I am- was addicted to pills and alcohol. I became an addict because my mom and her boyfriend used to beat me up when I was younger so I ran away. Running away as a tiny blonde girl who hasn't even finished high school or lived, is not a good idea..." she gnawed on her bottom lip as she picked at the skin on the side of her thumb.

Her eyes looked almost zoned out, the color disappearing almost completely as they turned dark.

"I ended up in New York, which was a worse idea. I met my ex, who is also my son's father, and he got me addicted to pills. I would've downed a bottle of allergy medicine if it could've gotten me high...anyways, he tried to traffick me and I almost fell for it because well, I'm stupid and I didn't know what he was talking about. I found out I was pregnant, ran away back to Michigan, got clean, had my angel, and then...ya know..." she sat up straight, slapping her hands down on her thigh.

She took a deep breath as she rubbed the bridge of her nose. "I lost my son because I couldn't get a job with no high school degree so that really really fucked me up. Like bad...so I did some drugs, felt a little better, met some old dude who was into some freaky shit and he helped me get my son back and I got clean. The end." She cleared her throat, avoiding eye contact with anybody who tried to offer her any look that she may have thought signaled judgment.

Clapping rang through the air, her cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

"Thank you for sharing, Alissa."

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