his muse ; reader imagines

It's not living ~

Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x reader

Warnings: mentions of xavier's nightmares, reader is a little clingy, crying (not in bad way)

~

Earlier in the evening you had received a text from Xavier that simply read: I'm in my studio if you need me. And you had started to miss him a bit even though you had just seen him a few hours ago.

So here you were, standing alone outside of his art studio at nearly 6pm. You smiled to yourself then walked in, the reminder of how Xavier had told you that you didn't need to knock when you came here going through your mind.

You walked in to see him incredibly focused on another painting of the monster he had been seeing quite often in his nightmares, music by The 1975 quietly playing on his phone. In fact, he was so focused to the point where he hadn't even noticed that you were now standing in his studio.

You wanted to help him destress a little bit, so you thought you'd get him to take a break from his art by comforting him and getting his mind off of that monster.

You slowly walked up behind him and placed one of your hands on his right shoulder, causing him to jump in his seat and set down the paintbrush that had been in his hand.

"It's just me" you told him while you placed your other hand on his other shoulder, assuring him that you were not the monster that had been clouding his mind.

He let out a relieved sigh at the sound of your voice then leaned over a little to pause the music he had been playing. He then turned around on his stool to face you, his eyes still a bit wide.

But that shocked look quickly went away once he tipped his head up and let his eyes meet yours, instantly feeling a sense of comfort. You always made him feel safe and he was more than happy to have you here, not wanting to deal with the feelings these nightmares caused on his own.

Not wanting to say anything to you quite yet, he then wrapped his long arms around your waist and started to bury his face in your sternum. He felt truly at peace as you wrapped your own arms around him and held him close to your body.

And just a few minutes later when he was ready to speak, he tipped his head up again and began to softly press his chin into your stomach while he looked up at you.

"Whenever I look into your eyes I feel as if you are putting me back together again. Piece by piece" he admitted while he began to hold you as tightly as he possibly could in this position.

The sound of those sweet words falling from his lips causing a soft smile to appear on your face. It made you happy to know that you are actually able to make him feel okay again whenever he's feeling horrible.

You then leaned down and pressed a light kiss to his lips, prompting Xavier to join you on his feet and kiss you back so that you wouldn't have to lean down to reach him. His hands were now holding your face and your face was tipped up towards his.

And after a few more kisses, Xavier mentally decided that he had a few more things he wanted to say to you, "I love you more than you'll ever know, pretty girl. You could take away all of my senses and I'd still find you. Truly" he made known to you, his eyes never leaving your own, not even for a second.

This time, his words caused a sad smile to appear on your face. You knew you meant a lot to him, but you didn't know that you meant that much. But you had to admit, it felt good to be loved in this way by him.

"I love you too" you replied, desperately trying to hold your tears back but you gave up and let them flow just a few seconds later.

Xavier wiped your tears away almost immediately then bent down and hooked his large hands under your thighs so that he could pick you up. He wanted to hold you as close to his body as he could like you had been doing with him not too long ago.

You instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around the back of his neck, silently enjoying the feeling of being so close to him as if your souls were intertwined.

His bent his head down a little once again to lean his head against your own, his soft lips resting against one of your temples.

He pressed a kiss there then spoke again, "You're mine, all mine" he murmured against your skin, now starting to slowly sway your bodies together as one.

You smiled the feeling of what he had just done and now felt the need to do some reminding of your own, "I'll always be here for you, Xavier. No matter what happens, I'll always be by your side" you told him, feeling his hold on your thighs tighten a little bit.

You felt his tears start to slide down your cheek, signalling to you that you had accidentally made him cry by reminding him that you would always be there for him. You then tapped his back twice, your way of telling him that it was okay to wrap his arms around your ribs again.

And once his arms had shifted up to your ribs, you started to rub soothing circles into his back with all of your fingers on your dominant hand, "I got you, pretty boy" you told him, pausing for a moment to press a kiss to his damp cheek, "I'm here, I'm not going anywhere. You're safe, let your mind relax for a little while. Okay?" you said, earning a nod from him in response.

"Okay" he mumbled as you then started to pull away from him a little.

You stared his face for a moment then started to press kisses all over his face, not caring if his tears got on your lips or not. You continued this for a few more moments and didn't stop until you heard him laugh.

You then pulled away and looked at his face once more, happy to see a smile on his face, "There's my pretty boy" you said as another smile rolled out across your face, making Xavier blush.

Xavier stared at your face for a moment like you had done then pressed a bruising kiss to your lips, "I love you, so much." he told you once his lips left yours, pure sincerity in his green eyes.

You tilted your head at him, the smile on your face now soft, "I love you more" you replied.

"Not possible" he said before he then lovingly rubbed his nose against your own, causing a fluttery feeling to appear in your stomach.