Alexander
November 3rd
It was like reliving a moment all over again. The circumstances were scarily similar.
I watched as my brother broke down in front of me.
And once again I felt like a helpless child watching him.
He sat against the wall, looking scarily like dad. Jax and Grey were beside him although neither of them spoke a word.
That was more unusual in itself.
I felt sick as I paced around. I'd grown to love Eva very much. She was the sister I never had. She got me in ways my brother just couldn't wrap his head around, she couldn't fucking die. That just isn't fucking fair.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. It was Markus, he'd been sent out to find the bastards that shot Ev. I was glad to see his call, I was hoping he'd be able to give some good news.
"hello" I answered the call
"we have them Xander" he sounded out of breath.
"thank fuck" I sighed in relief.
The three on the floor looked up at me, giving me a strange look.
"we got them" I mouthed
Jax threw his hands up and Greyson shook Nate a little. Nathan wasn't really reacting to anything. He seemed to be in his own world.
That was understandable.
"what do you want us to do with them?" he asked
"you know where to take them, just keep them alive, alright?"
"you got it," he replied, "how is she?"
"don't know yet, i'll keep everyone updated" I say whilst walking away from the waiting area.
"okay, she's in our prayers man" Markus's reassuring voice somehow made me feel a little better
"thanks, Nate appreciates it"
Everyone Loved her, even though she was lowkey terrified of all of them. She was quite literally the only thing everyone could agree on.
Everyone loved Eva - and she could do no wrong.
I ended the call after that as Christian was making his way towards me.
"any update?" he was breathless from walking so fast. He seemed happy but it was clear he was trying to hide that.
"no," I shake my head,
We look at each other for a moment, "is the baby here?" I finally ask
"yes he is" he nodded, a smile forming in his face.
"congratulations, a boy!" I hugged him.
"thank you... should I wait to tell the rest?" his expression dropped a little.
"no, they need some good news... plus the faster you tell them, the faster I can meet him" I laugh, pushing him down the hallway.
We both walked back into the waiting area. Nate was talking to doctor. The other two stood behind him, both looking miserable.
"oh God" Christian Muttered under his breath.
I stood there frozen for a moment, waiting for my brother to give me a damn sign.
I watched as Nate stumbled back.
No
He stormed past me at speed towards the door.
Jaxon and Greyson went to follow after him but I stopped them.
"Chris has good news, you should tell them"
Christian gave me a confused look, but I didn't say anything before heading after my brother.
"Nate" I called out
He was crouched on the ground, violently throwing up.
My heart sank.
"Nate" I repeat as I make my way towards him.
He glanced up at me, his eyes were bloodshot from all the crying.
I'd only seen my brother cry twice, when my mother died and today.
He wasn't one to show how he felt.
Neither of us were but I was working on it.
"here" I hand him the bottle of water i'd been carrying around with me for the past hour or so.
I stood there waiting for him to say something. It took him a few minutes but he finally broke the silence that was forming.
"she's alive" his voice was hoarse.
A sense of relief washed over me, but he didn't seem to share the feeling.
"isn't that good?" I bent down next to him
"they lost her for 4 fucking minutes" he held his head in his hands, "they don't know if she'll actually wake up"
I didn't know what to tell him, I didn't know how to make it better.
I don't think I actually could this time.
"Nate.." I hugged him,
"Alex, I can't do this, I can't live without her" The tears continued to run down his face.
"she's going to be fine" I kept repeating it, hoping it would make it true.
I don't know if I was trying to manifest it into existence or what but either way she had to be fine.
We sat outside for probably the best part of an hour. We just sat there, not saying a word to each other.
I think it was all he needed at this moment in time, it was all I could give.
"any news from Chris?" he spoke up.
"yeah, the baby's here, it's a boy" I say quietly.
There was a glint of sadness in his eyes but he forced it away, "that's good"
"it's getting cold, we should go back inside" I stand up, pulling him with me.
He nodded and followed after me. He didn't seem as upset, in fact he seemed nothing and that's what scared me.
I'd only began to get him back. When our mother died, the person i'd once called my brother changed. The always smiling kid disappeared as more and more burdens fell on him.
He became a shell of his former self.
Eva brought him back... She made him smile again.
We walked inside to be greeted by Jax and Greyson.
"is everything okay? you scared us" Concern was written all over their faces.
Nate sighed, only making their expressions worse.
"she's okay" I give a small nod
"oh thank fuck" They both let out a sigh of relief.
They both hugged Nate but he kind of just stood there and let it happen.
I know there was something else he wasn't telling me. I just didn't know how to get it out of him at this moment in time.
"you two want to meet the baby? he's pretty cool" Jax changed the subject to more positive one.
I was very excited to meet the baby, but I had to hold back that excitement, it really didn't seem appropriate to express that right now.
"it'll take your mind off things Nate" Greyson rubbed his shoulder.
"yeah okay" he shrugged
Greyson lead the way through the halls of this damned place. I fucking hated hospitals. There was nothing good about them.
Me and Nate waited in the doorway as the other two went in.
Chris stood there holding his kid, that alone was crazy.
The fact he was a dad now was crazy.
I'd always thought Greyson would be the first.
Mila looked up, almost surprised to see us.
"Nate?" she sat up, "is she okay?"
"yeah she's fine"
he was a good liar, but she was good at reading in between the lines.
"Nate?" she repeated herself.
He took a deep breath, "they don't know if she's going to wake up"
He leant against the door frame, completely emotionless.
"but she's alive"
The rest of them had no words.
"I get the hating birthday thing now" Mila's voice was quiet
Nate began to laugh, "they're the fucking worst"
That they were.
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Romance*currently editing** "I turned around to see Nathan, he was already looking at me with the biggest smile on his face. His hair was already covered in snow flakes. "and I didn't think it was possible to love you anymore than I already did" he gave...
