Are you okay?

Chapter 37

Evangeline
September 24th

I silently watched as the second line appeared almost immediately.
"shit"

My heart sank.
I wasn't ready for this.
I didn't want this.

We'd been so careful but I suppose that's what everyone says.
This was the third test i'd taken in the space of half an hour. Each one came back positive, there was no way I could even pretend to deny it. The lines were so clear.
I felt like I could be sick. I know I need to tell Nate but I have not one fucking clue on how to go about this.
We hadn't had the kid talk, which is stupid, but I believe we're both on the same page about not wanting kids right now.
Life was too over the place right now to bring another innocent life into the mix.
This was not a good time to get fucking pregnant.

I have to tell him now or I'm not going to have the guts to do it later.
It might not be so bad.
He might have the right words to say and make me feel a little better about all this
or he might completely freak the fuck out.

I slid the test into my back pocket and ensured it couldn't be seen before leaving the bathroom. It was still early enough in the morning and when i'd went in, the apartment was still empty but there was a high chance that at least one of them had now joined Nathan.

Low and behold I was correct, Jaxon and Xander where both standing there, looking serious for a change. All three of them were huddled around a table.

"is everything okay?" I ask quietly as I move in beside Nate.

"Nope" Xander sighed, running his hand through his hair, "but apparently there's nothing we can do about it"

I looked down at the pages on the table, there was a bunch of scribbling on them, stuff I didn't really understand.

"i'm not saying we can't do anything about it, i'm just saying what can we actually do at this point?"
Jaxon lifted the pages out of the folder he was holding and waved them in Xander's face.

"will you stop trying to piss me off" Xander pushed him away

"what happened?" I looked over at Nathan, who was yet to speak.

"I don't know because these two won't stop bitching, will one of you please tell me what happened last night?"
His eyes were full of anger as he looked back at me, then at them again. I suddenly became incredibly nervous about what I was about to tell him.

"oh" was all I could say as I walked away from them.
I needed a moment to think, I was suddenly loosing the 'just tell him' attitude. Now didn't seem like a good time at all.

"are you okay?" I felt his arms surround me as I reached for a glass.
"i'm fine" I force myself to smile.
"you don't look it, I thought you were over that thing from last week" he placed his hand against my forehead.

"last week was rough" Jax chirped, "you nearly took us all out" He poked Xander.
Xander didn't verbally reply but he did punch Jax in the arm, incredibly hard.

"I am" I attempt to reassure him, "that whole topic just makes me feel uneasy"

He didn't look convinced at all. He was usually able to read me like a damn book, it was really hard to lie to him.

He turned around to face Jaxon and Xander, who were already talking about something else and completely blanking us.
"c'mon" he gently took my hand and led us back into the bedroom.

I stood silently, my heart racing. It was all I could hear.
"baby what is wrong?" The softness in his voice seemed to have an instant calming effect, however it didn't make me feel any less grim about everything.

I shuffled around trying to find the smallest bit of strength to just tell him. If he really was the person I believed him to be then it would be fine.

"Evie, you're worrying me"

I took a deep breath before finally reaching into my pocket and handing him the test.
He took it from my hand hesitantly.

I nervously watched as he stared at it in his hands. I genuinely couldn't tell what he was thinking and it was scaring me.

"you're pregnant?" his voice was quiet, almost raspy as he spoke.
His eyes looked at me in disbelief.

I gave a small nod, "yeah"

He sort of stumbled back towards the bed before finally sitting down. He intently stared at the test in his hands, trying to work out his next words.

I slowly walk towards him, waiting a few seconds between each step.
He didn't seem mad or angry, he just seemed nothing which part of me believed was worse. I had no idea what he was thinking.

He finally looked up at me again, a smile forming on his face.
Relief washed over me as he pulled me closer.
"you're not angry?"

"why would I be angry sunshine?" he sounded confused

"I don't know, we just hadn't talked about this or planned this... I just didn't know how you'd react" I muttered

"it's not great timing sure" he laughed softly, "but that's okay"

I took a deep breath, trying to hold back my tears, they weren't sad tears, they were just kind of there. I think I was just completely overwhelmed at this point.

"why are you crying?" he reached up and wiped away the tears that were rolling down my cheeks.

"I don't know, I cry a lot" I sniff, "you know that"

"I do" he smiled, "but we're going to be okay, we'll make it work like we always have"

"and you're not mad?"

"no sunshine" he shook his head, "I am not mad"

He placed his hand on my stomach before resting his head against me.
"it's just another part of you that I get to love"