Into The Unknown (COMPLETED)

AUTHOR'S NOTE

I want to say thank you sa mga matyagang nagbasa nang istoryang ito until the end. It's been a years since na umpisahan kong isulat ito, it holds a lot of memories. But I have to end it now, I'm very thankful because I found a place where I can write and tell my feelings. And ito nga yung story na ito, nagawa kong isulat ang mga failures, heartbreaks, painful event and happening by giving them characters. But over all they are just the same person who happens to feel a lot. I guess it's time for me to let it go and write a new one.

This book means a lot to me, imagine the up and down that I've been going through before I finished this story. It holds a lot.

I can still remember how many time I broke down, how many times I cry, how many times I died. But this book help me to get  through it.

Imagine how many times I tried to give up and just end it but I can't. Because I still not get enough, it feels unfair to let go when you're not get enough from the pain, disappointment and failures. So instead of ending it that easy I still continue despite all the pain and giving up.

Dumating na din ako a point ng buhay ko na tapusin na lang ang lahat ng walang pasabi o paalam. Kasi naisip ko wala din namang may paki kung gagawin ko yun, but then I realized naumpisahan ko na eh. Ngayon pa ba ako titigil, I'm not satisfied. Gusto kong makita ang katapusan, I want to know if it is worth it.

Gusto ko lang makahinga noong mga panahon na isinusulat ko pa lang ito, but hindi ko inasahan na I can give little comfort by writing it. Natuwa ako at nakakita ng liwanag noong mga panahong yun, but then hindi nagtagal yun until I stopped again. Pero look, I'm here na. But too sad I have to say goodbye to all of those people who help me to get over it, to go passed it. I have to say goodbye to my friends and people. I have to say goodbye to my characters who keep me going.

I want to write again, I want to write what I want it to be. I hope na sana ay samahan nyo ako uli. I'm very thankful dahil kahit papaano ay mayroon dyan na nakaka-appeiciate na ginawa ko. It means a lot. Maliit na bagay, oo. Lalo na kung yung appreciation na yun ay di ko natanggap mula sa mga taong inaasahan mo na magbibigay nito. Lalo na kung ginawa mo naman ang lahat ng makakaya mo para sa kapakanan nila at kabutihan. But in the end, it still useless and meaningless. Kahit na you give up your happiness para sa kanila.

Alam nyo yun, yung kailangan mo silang masaktan dahil sa pagiging totoo para lang malaman nila na nandyan ka at may nararamdaman ka pa din, pero sa huli ikaw palagi ang laging lumalabas na masama.

Ang hirap pala nun, imagine your hand is gold but your heart is cold then your hand is cold when your heart is gold.

Imagine how many times you try to end your suffering but you felt scared dahil sa isipin na you will leave them at mag-suffer. Yung gusto mong umalis pero natatakot ka sa sakit na ma-iiwan mo sa mga tao sa paligid mo, kaya mas pinili mo na lang manatili as cold corpse walking like a robot para lang mailigtas sila sa matinding sakit na nararamdaman mo nang dahil sa kanila