Ditto Dissonance (Yellow and Mishaps #1)

Chapter 34

Chapter 34: Approaching Dissonance

#DittoDissonanceWP

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[REVISED VERSION: NOVEMBER 2025]

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Caiden's Point of View

It felt like he was uncomfortable. I tried to wave subtly, hoping to show that everything was fine, but he gave me an even more uncomfortable smile before turning away.

I was left... confused. But I understood if he was still uncomfortable, that was valid. It was not my place to dictate how he should feel.

What mattered was... that I think we were fine, and I'd apologized for everything.

I expressed everything that had to be expressed. Tanggap ko naman na naging uncomfortable si Zern sa naging sitwasyon, ang hindi ko lang maintindihan kung bakit parang hindi pa rin kami okay after naming mag-usap. Nago-overthink ako na baka may hindi pa ako nasasabi o nae-express kaya siya naging uncomfortable. Baka may nasabi pa akong mali noon na na-hurt siya nang sobra at kung mayroon man gusto kong humingi rin ng sorry, kaso hindi ko naman sigurado kung mayroon ba o kung anuman 'yon.

Matapos naming kumain nina Magnus at Mishael, humiwalay na sa amin si Mishael dahil magsha-shower na raw siya. At habang naglalakad kami nang mabagal ni Magnus, bigla niyang nabuksan ang topic tungkol ulit kay Zern.

"He looks nice though," sabi ni Magnus kaya napalingon ako sa kaniya.

"Zern?" I clarified.

He smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, 'yong sinabi niya tungkol sa pagiging mabait, he has a point. No'ng nakuwento mo 'yong trauma mo sa amin noon, na paniguradong ako na lang ang nakakatanda, naisip ko rin 'yong sinabi ni Zern that time."

He looked away and sighed. "Na sana piliin mo pa ring maging mabait kahit ang gulo at maraming masasama sa mundo. Kaso ayaw kong ma-feel mong dinidiktahan ko ang nararamdaman mo. Kaya hinayaan kita sa kung ano ang gusto mo, dahil somehow do'n mo mas nararamdaman ang sarili mo. Alam ko namang as we grow up, mare-realize mo rin 'yong mga bagay na dapat mong ma-realize dahil wise kang tao, Caiden," Magnus said.

"Thanks, man. That's nice." I chuckled, smiling. "Minsan hindi ko alam kung paano ie-express 'yong nararamdaman ko sa mga na-realize ko kaya lumalabas na parang ang blunt kong magsalita. Ino-overthink ko kanina pa kung bakit ang uncomfortable ng mukha ni Zern no'ng umalis sila ni Ashton."

I paused, sighing. "Pakiramdam ko, may nagawa pa ako at gusto niyang mag-apologize ako ro'n specifically. Or baka wala naman, baka ino-overthink ko lang. I don't know, man. Naba-bother ako. Gusto ko lang na maging maayos kami nang fully ni Zern."

"Sa sinasabi mo, pre, parang gusto mo na siyang maging kaibigan, e. Gusto mo na siyang maging parte ng buhay mo," sabi ni Magnus kaya nangunot ang noo ko.

"Uh. . . not really, man. Gusto ko lang ma-feel 'yung ease na okay na talaga siya at hindi na niya 'yon dadalhin," sabi ko.

Tumango-tango si Magnus bago ako tinapik sa braso. "That's for you to find out, p're. Kung gusto mo talagang ma-make sure na okay na si Zern, you should ask him or minsan kasi... mas magandang hayaan mo na lang. Stop overdoing things. Baka kasi mas lumala at mas nakaka-trigger para sa tao. Just let him process, man. He'll be fine."

Napabuntonghininga ako sa sinabi ni Magnus. He has a point. Siguro, hayaan ko na lang muna siya. Mukhang kaya naman niyang alagaan ang sarili niya. For now, ang iisipin ko na lang ay maayos na kami at na-clear ko na lahat ng dapat i-clear. He agreed with everything that I said, I'll just let him process everything. Like Magnus said, he'll be fine. I hope he will be.