i need to be new

For That Boy, Pt. II (6-10 Feb 2024)

Like the sun shines, but would it be nice if it skipped a day?
I feel nice here, covered, I don't want to think about this
Why does it even matter?
Be chill, be yourself, then everyone will like you, right?
What if they don't?
What if those boys smile and look as if I wasn't eating lunch?
What do you talk about?
You know you changed an immeasurable amount but your playlist is still rotten, just a vibe
I wonder if you're old -- but I'm not talking about you
They're talking about me and you
If I'm in love and it's not romantic, if I hate you, nothing makes a difference
Drama is drama
Bless you when you're kind and then the right people are around and you better be a jerk
Scandalous of you

But maybe I just find myself covered with dust
And you're secretly amused
Like I know you smiled so it doesn't have anything to do with you

Streetlights colour the pavement, and I don't have you
I'm home I guess, but I'm all alone
And if I call you here you won't pick up the phone
I'm not justified
Secretly bitter like a broken kite
What's my reason why?

But surely you feel something or you wouldn't talk
If I can't play, can barely walk, mortified because
it is reality no matter how bleak it is
post-dramatic depression
do I feel better
shut up about it
we can sing

But I can do whatever I want
We can think our thoughts
Think you look nice in an aqua shirt, in your blue suit
Make conversation til the moment I spin
Your smile is wide
You're friendly, happy
I saw you helping her
Asking which side of the line, why you smirk when I tell you
You know you're gold, she knows
I like you but I talk to you still
We keep ourselves with one foot out of line
It's the things I said, the things you've done
Pleasurable when your light blue eyes dance and you ask me a question
(I should shut up right? Blame the music)
I can't even hear your accent, they get diluted
Thanks you too
Your dominant hand on my hip, it felt heavy
You know you shoot with your left, you flick and swish every time
You know it.
Your face was priceless when you saw the text-- you know your eyes shone a bit
You sit in the back, you sit on your phone
You look up, you look back down
You walked out, I'm bored now
I'm waiting, you were late for the photo
I like your eyes and they looked for a second while they rolled their eyes
Yes, I caught your eyes once, surprised me a little
Why were they my favourite things to catch
I guess they go on me, that works
Because you always do that

I miss when you notice
But you won't rescue me
That's why I keep him
He waves when he's mad
He'll talk, yeah he'll blink
Even when he's embarrassed
He'll sit next to me
He's gold like you