July 24, 2024

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by absy_22k

by absy_22k

So lovely
But do I not want to see it
A disappointment
Because I could relate now
Only a year and I can leave
The zone of trauma and go to a place where I have none from
I fit in here
But I might need to move on
I don't have to disagree with you
We don't have to talk
I'll see you later
Maybe
Imagine if we crashed
That would be nice
I could just be done now
Only downside i see is I can't help others
But do you hear
Screaming from the sidelines
Do you see me cry when i have to say bye
And all I do is wonder and I miss you
Can I trust He has you
Is He faithful to me?
Why do I want to leave?
Others want to come here
But I want to be done
Counting down the months
Because since 2020 it just teases me here
Everyone else in my family is fine
Doesn't affect them anymore?
Scarring, yeah
Why me
You're amusing feeling homey cause we all have problems
But I'm a different one
And you could call me lost, couldn't you
Am I insane
Like every time I strive then I fail
Like a miserable human
So hide me
And let me laugh with a baby
Let me comfort my friends
Let me keep You as Lord

Why do days go by so fast
Isn't it crazy how in the morning the light is still new
You're innocent
Just enjoying the view and the breeze
Like life is a stream
By 11pm you remembered everything again
And then you know if you have hope or not
Your heart broke and your heart was mended
You're alive but it's too deep to not be
Beauty but pain and the depth

My back hurts
Is it the bed?
Because it suddenly got hard
I liked it in Europe
Is it like you?
You stopped responding
We stopped talking
Am I done with sleep forever?
Done with hope or normality?
Is this the beginning of the end?
But the thoughts quench
I'm from nearby
What would I wish I had done if I died today
Rap like you
Spit bars like im loco cuz someone I hate did
But now I like him
I guess I change just like everybody else
Every time I get an email
I look hoping that it's you
But it isn't is it
What are you doing?
Are you crying because we're good at that
Oh sympathise
Memory loss
But I don't really care
I just can't quite bear it if we continue without this
But I guess we have to

One more year
Like a race that I'm almost done with
Will I be lonely
Am I?
These are grown men
I'll learn to live without trust
Like I've made it
I can help them
I'll always be there
I know how to deescalate situations
It's crazy

A different song
We are the same
And we are all so cool
But we don't have any true person anywhere
Everyone has gotten lost
And everything's beautiful
But we lose a lot
Some lost everything
And where's our hope?
Some clung to it as to life itself
And I see them smile when they lost their whole lives
And some glare at every passer-by because they lost it all
And it hurts
But I know it
Because it's the same for me
On a rough night
But I start to work through things
I'll enjoy seventeen
Are you?