desertion

57

BUCK

The sterile smell of antiseptic filled the area as I walked alongside Eddie, the tension palpable between us. After what felt like an eternity of waiting, Lydia was finally stable enough for visitors, and we were the only ones allowed to go back due to Covid.

As we approached her room, my heart raced. I caught a glimpse of Lydia through the window, her gaze fixed on the doctor standing beside her. She seemed distant, her expressions muted as she listened, offering only small hums and nods in response.

Eddie wasted no time as he stepped inside the room, moving quickly to Lydia's bedside. "Hey," he said, his voice filled with concern. "How are you feeling?"

I followed, taking a seat in the chair beside her bed. I watched as Lydia turned her head slightly, a small smile on her face, but it didn't reach her eyes. "I'm fine. It was nothing," she replied, her tone casual, as if trying to brush off the gravity of the situation.

Eddie frowned, clearly not satisfied with her answer. "Lydia, it wasn't just nothing," he countered firmly. Just then, the doctor interjected, explaining the situation in simple terms.

"It was an electrolyte imbalance," he said, maintaining a calm demeanor. "You need to start drinking more water and eating more fruits and vegetables."

Lydia leaned back against her pillow, letting out a frustrated sigh. The doctor offered a reassuring smile before he excused himself, closing the door behind him.

Eddie turned back to her, his eyes searching hers. "Do you need anything?" he asked, concern lacing his voice.

Lydia shook her head defiantly, repeating, "It was nothing."

Eddie sighed, clearly exasperated. "Lydia, it wasn't nothing. You're literally in the hospital."

She rolled her eyes, her gaze shifting to Buck. "I'm fine, Buck," she assured him, though he could see the worry etched across his face reflected in her eyes.

I nodded, wanting to believe her. "I know," he replied gently. "You scared us."

Lydia merely nodded, her attention drifting back to the ceiling. The silence between them felt heavy, filled with unspoken words and emotions.

"When can I go home?" Lydia suddenly asked, her voice laced with impatience.

Eddie's expression softened, but he remained firm. "You need to get better first. There's no point in worrying about that right now," he said, trying to keep the frustration out of his tone.

Lydia shot back, "I'd get better faster in my own bed, not in a hospital that's risky to be in."

Eddie sighed, trying to maintain his composure. "You need to stay here for just a little bit longer, Lydia. You need rest."

Her eyes narrowed, clearly frustrated with the entire situation. She rolled onto her side, pulling her knees to her chest, her back facing Eddie. I could sense her anger, but there was something deeper-an ache that clung to her words, something she wasn't ready to share.

The room fell silent, the rhythmic beeping of the machines filling the air as I watched her. I could tell she was struggling with something more than just her health.

Finally, Lydia spoke up, her voice shaky. "Every time I end up in the hospital, I almost die or someone else does," she said, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Like Mom, or when the tsunami hit."

She paused, her breath hitching in her throat. "I hate hospitals," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "I'd rather be in my own bed."

Eddie's expression shifted to one of deep concern, and he spoke up softly. "You're going to be okay. No one is dying, Lydia. You're safe here."

Lydia sighed, the tension in her body slowly releasing as she muttered something to herself before closing her eyes, surrendering to her exhaustion.

I glanced over at Eddie, seeing the concern etched on his face. "She's been through a lot.." he whispered, shaking his head.

"She'll be okay, she just needs time." I said, looking back over at her.

I could sense the weight of Eddie's words, the unspoken fears lingering just beneath the surface. He turned back to Lydia, watching as her breathing gradually steadied, her face relaxing as sleep began to claim her. There was a peace in her expression that hadn't been there moments before, but it felt fragile, as if it could shatter at any moment.

Eddie leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms as he continued to observe Lydia. I could see the struggle in his eyes-the balance between wanting to protect his daughter and the realization that he couldn't shield her from everything.

"Do you think she's really okay?" I asked, my voice low, careful not to disturb the quiet atmosphere.

Eddie sighed deeply. "I hope so. She's been through a lot. I just... I don't want her to feel like she's alone in this," he replied, his voice thick with emotion.

I nodded, understanding the depth of his fears. "She's not alone. She has us. And the 118. We'll all be here for her."

Eddie glanced at me, a flicker of gratitude crossing his features. "Thanks, Buck. I know it's hard for her to open up about everything. I just wish she didn't have to go through it at all."

"Me too." I said. "But she's strong. She'll get through it."

As they sat in silence, the beeping of the machines continued to fill the room, a gentle reminder of the reality they were all facing. My thoughts drifted to Lydia's earlier words, the pain of her past echoing in my mind.

"Do you think she'll talk about it?" I asked hesitantly, unsure if I was crossing a line.

Eddie shrugged, his eyes still fixed on Lydia. "I hope so. Sometimes I think she feels like she has to carry it all by herself. I wish she knew she doesn't have to."

I leaned back in the chair, contemplating Eddie's words. I knew Lydia well enough to understand that she often kept her feelings bottled up, too afraid to let anyone in. But I also knew that the more we supported her, the more chance she had of opening up.

As the minutes passed, I watched Lydia sleep, her face softening in the dim light. I hoped she could find peace, even if just for a moment.

There was a knock at the door and Eddie softly said come in. The doctor stood there, looking at Lydia. "You guys should go get some rest, and let her rest." The doctor said.

I nodded softly, standing up. "I'm fine here." Eddie says. I looked over at him. "Okay. Just don't wear yourself out. We don't need both of you in a hospital bed." I said with a small laugh.

Eddie laughed softly as well. I smiled softly before walking out of the room and heading back down to the waiting room.