desertion

175

LYDIA

The sun was barely creeping through my curtains when my alarm went off. For once, I didn't feel like I'd been hit by a freight train. The sleep I managed to get last night wasn't perfect, but it was enough to keep me functioning. I stretched, letting my arms fall back onto the bed, and stared at the ceiling for a moment. My body didn't feel as heavy, but I couldn't shake the fog in my mind.

I went through the motions-shower, coffee, bagel-and headed out the door. The city seemed quieter this morning, or maybe it was just me. My body was moving, but my mind wasn't completely caught up.

By the time I got to the station, the robotic rhythm of my day had already taken hold. I walked into our office, spotting Mason slouched in his chair, staring blankly at his computer screen. His hair was a mess, and his shirt was slightly wrinkled. He didn't even look up as I entered.

"Morning," I said, dropping my bag onto my desk and taking my seat.

He glanced up, a tired smile tugging at his lips. "Morning."

"You look worse than me today," I teased, opening the case file in front of me.

"Gee, thanks," he said, rubbing his eyes. "Just what every guy wants to hear first thing in the morning."

I chuckled softly. "Sorry, handsome. Better?"

"Much." He smirked, but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

We worked in silence for a while, the clicking of keyboards and rustling of papers filling the room. I kept stealing glances at him, noticing the tension in his shoulders and the way he kept running a hand through his hair.

"Mace," I said after a while, breaking the silence. "You okay?"

He sighed, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. "I'm fine."

"That's not convincing," I said, tilting my head. "Come on, what's going on?"

He hesitated for a moment before finally speaking. "I'm just... tired," he admitted. "Not just work tired. Like... tired of everything tired."

I set down my pen, giving him my full attention. "Talk to me."

He let out a bitter laugh. "What's there to say? My parents don't care about me. They never have. They don't even check in anymore unless it's to complain about something or ask for a favor. I'm just... over it, you know?"

I nodded, my chest tightening at his words. "I'm sorry, Mason. You don't deserve that."

"It's whatever," he said, shrugging. "I'm used to it."

"That doesn't make it okay," I said softly. "You deserve people who care about you, who actually show it. And for the record, I care. A lot."

He looked at me, his eyes softening. "Thanks, Lyds. That means more than you know."

I smiled gently, reaching across the desk to squeeze his hand. "Anytime."

We sat like that for a moment before he pulled his hand back and ran it through his hair again. "I'm sorry for dumping all of that on you," he said.

"Don't apologize," I said firmly. "I'd rather you talk to me than keep it all bottled up."

He nodded, a small smile returning to his face. "You're pretty great, you know that?"

"Yeah, I know," I said, smirking.

He laughed, the sound lighter than before. "Cocky much?"

"Confident," I corrected, grinning.

The rest of the day passed in a blur of paperwork and quiet conversations. Mason seemed a little lighter after our talk, but I didn't bring up my own struggles. I couldn't. He already had enough on his plate.

Instead, I threw myself into work, following the motions without really thinking. Each task was like a puzzle piece sliding into place, keeping my mind too busy to dwell on anything else.

As the day wound down, Mason leaned back in his chair, stretching. "I think we actually made progress today," he said, looking over at me.

"Yeah, we did," I said, closing the file in front of me.

"You doing okay?" he asked, his voice softer now.

"Always," I said, forcing a smile.

He raised an eyebrow but didn't push it. "Well, if you ever need to talk, you know where to find me."

"Same goes for you," I said.

He smiled standing and grabbing his bag. "See you tomorrow!"

"See you," I replied, watching as he walked out.

I leaned back in my chair, staring at the empty office. One day, I'd get past all of this. One day, I'd be able to live without feeling like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. But for now, I'd just keep going. It was all I knew how to do.