Shawn Mendes Imagines

[13] Hosptials

Shawn's POV

I ran, ran with all my power to the room they directed me to. My heart was racing and my head was pounding. A call in the middle of the night about my girlfriend being in the hospital is the last thing I had on my mind when I went to bed. Holy shit I can't process anything right now.

When I entered the room there were doctors and nurses everywhere, they were trying to do anything to make my girl better.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked looking at one of the head doctors.

"You must be..."

"Loving, caring boyfriend of hers. My name is Shawn," I answer.

"Well Shawn, as you know she had cancer in her lungs but we caught before it could spread and she was cancer free. That was about a year ago, now the cancer is back in her lungs but it has spread to her heart. Her parents woke to the sound of screaming in the middle of the night and she has passed out; she hasn't woken since."

I thought it was gone. Last year was horrible for me, the thought of losing Y/N was like living in hell. She was my soulmate. We were graduating next month and I was planning on proposing to her. After 3 long years of dating I would be marrying her. But the dumb cancer is making this difficult and as much as I want to have hope, the back of my mind is telling me 'she will die today, the cancer is just to much for her'.

"Shawn?" Somebody asks from behind me.

I turn around and see her mom standing there with bags under her eyes.

"I-I don't want her to die," I say shaking me head.

Tears finally start to slip out of my eyes and I fall to the ground. Her mom kneels down and rubs my back.

"Shh, Shawn she will fight through this. There may be a way to remove it. She's about to go into surgery, why don't you go home and come back in a couple of hours?"

"I won't be able to sleep. I need to stay in her room," I demand.

"Well there's a pull out a bed in there. Just please, rest."

I nod my head and get up. The pull out bed isn't the best, but it's manageable. I wake up a couple hours later and look around the room. It's quiet...too quiet. I walk out of the room and look down the hallways, it's empty. Am I dreaming?

"Shawn."

My head shoots back and I see Y/N standing there in a hospital gown.

"How-did the surgery go well?" I ask walking up to her.

She doesn't answer me.

"Y/N?"

"I-I'm dead Shawn," She whispers, a single tear rolling off her eye.

"What? No. That's not possible. How am I seeing you if you're dead?" I deny everything she is saying; Y/N is not dead, she is not dead.

"I came to visit you one last time, in your dreams. I love you Shawn, and I know you were going to ask me to marry you. You need to hide the box in a more secret place next time instead of your shirt drawer," Y/N chuckles.

"Okay, but there won't be a next time because when I wake up you'll be better and I'll be marrying you in a couple months."

"Shawn," She says placing her hand on my cheek; it's cold. "I am dead. When you wake up it will all come crashing to you what just happened. You will crash and I won't be there to pick you back up. You need to move on from me-"

"No," I state shaking my head. "You are fucking not dead and I will never ever move on from you. You're my fucking life, how could I forget you?"

Y/N kisses me on the lips and pulls away, "Goodbye. I love you."

I shoot out of my bed and see doctors outside the room. What just happened does indeed hit me and I run out of the room to find doctors helping up Y/N's mom. No.

"Mr.Mendes," The same doctor that I talked to earlier comes up to me. "I-I don't know what to say to you but, Y/N died during surgery. There was possible nothing-"

"THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING TO DO!" I yell pinning him against the wall. "You let her die! She was the fucking love of my life and now I have nothing. You're putting her mother into a deep depression and me into an even more deep one. You all are to blame for this. Fuck you."

Security guards have to grab me and drag me out of the hospital. I head to my car and slam my head against the steering wheel.

"You're not dead, you're not dead!" I scream while my nails dig into the leather of the steering wheel. Tears stream down my cheeks and I don't think I've ever cried this much in my life before. I've had great-grandmas pass away before but I was never close with them. This is so much different. I love her, with all my heart.

I managed to drive home without wanting to kill myself. I went into the house and my parents were waiting for me. They had saddened expressions on their faces; they knew what happened.

"I'm so sorry-"

"Don't," I say heading up the stairs.

"Shawn we need to talk about this. I know this is a rough time for you," My dad says following me up the stairs.

I turn around and show them my blood shot eyes and red cheeks, "See this? This is called pain. I will not talk about this because it will only make me depressed even more. You have no idea what it feels like to lose the person you love the most. Just, please leave me alone."

I went into my room and shut the door; I never came back out.

—

First off, sorry I made you die. And secondly the last line you can inference either way; he killed himself or he just was too depressed to come out of the room and talk to anyone. You can decide which one you want to end it with. I almost cried while writing this, whoops.

-brooke