People plan, life happens

Chapter thirty five:

And I,

Would have stayed up,

With you all night,

Had I known,

How to save a life.

Christina's POV:

The next few days alone were way better than the first.

I had discovered that using the Tula baby carrier, which was basically a little back pack with arm and leg holes, I could do everything I needed to do while Scarlet was content pressed up against my middle. When she fell asleep, I slipped her out and into her bassinet and she never noticed.

It was around three or so, I don't know the exact time, when I heard a knock at the door. Scarlet wasn't being too fussy so she was in her swing instead of in the Tula, so I stretched and went to answer the door.

Burke's POV:

I had no clue why I was at Christina's.

I had the day off, my girls were with my Mother (who was visiting for a little bit), which meant I had the day to do whatever I felt like.

I knew I still loved Christina, and I knew that I shouldn't have left her at the alter four years ago. She was ready to marry me, I was ready to marry her, and I left. If I had've just stayed, maybe we'd have a little family instead of her being married to Owen.

I had not a clue what I was expecting when I knocked on her door, I really didn't, but I just needed to talk to her.

She answered the door, her hair was pulled into a pony tail and she was wearing those Stanford sweat pants and a baggy grey shirt. Still, with bags under her eyes and not a stitch of make up, she looked gorgeous.

"Burke?" She said, surprised "you're not at work?"

"I had the day off" I tell her "My Mother has the girls for the day, I think they're shopping" I smile.

She chuckles "Girls will be girls" she shrugs "I'm assuming you came here for some company?" she asks.

I nod "We haven't talked much, I just wanted to see how you were"

She steps aside and opens the door wider "Come on in, Scarlet's in her swing if you wanted to say hello" she jokes.

Scarlet, sure enough, is sucking on a pacifier while staring at the little toys that hung down over her swing.

"Hi Scarlet" I greet. She looks at me, her face the spitting image of Christina's but with blue eyes, and goes back to staring at her little toys.

"She's in a lovely mood today" Christina tells me "she hasn't cried too much"

I nod agreeably and sit down "She looks exactly like you, head full of curls and all"

She smiles and sits next to me "She has his eyes, my everything else"

"I wonder what her personality will be like" I muse "she's too young now to really tell"

"I hope she gets Owen's personality, with my determination" Christina thinks aloud "that would be a good combination"

My heart aches at the thought that this could have been my baby, my house, she could have been my wife. We could have had a life together but I left, I messed everything up and I left.

"Christina" I sigh "I just...I'm here because I wanted to say I'm really sorry"

She looks up, startled "What?"

"I shouldn't have left" I say, matter of factly "I should have stayed, we were good together Christina. I shouldn't have left without talking to you or saying goodbye, it was wrong of me and I regret it every day of my life" I say sorrowfully.

She's silent, I'm worried she'll react badly.

"I missed you" Christina says finally "I missed you after you left. I was upset and angry and I hated that I missed you" her voice is soft, she doesn't seem to be angry with me anymore.

"I'm sorry" We're facing each other now, I can see her gorgeous brown eyes and I know she's sad thinking about what happened.

"I'm glad you said you're sorry" she smiles a small smile, and I fall in love all over again. I really missed her, I really really did.

I knew I shouldn't have, I should have left it at that and just asked about Scarlet again, Owen was a good man and this was HIS wife, not mine. But I couldn't find the will power to care.

I kissed her.

She froze up, not moving forward but not moving backwards. She was perfectly still, and when I pulled away her eyes were wide as she brought her fingers up to graze her lips.

"I think you should leave" she says "Thank you for coming by, but please leave" she says.

I don't say a word, I just stand up and I leave.

Christina's POV:

Holy crap.

I wasn't sure what to think or what to do. I knew getting rid of him was crucial, I was married and he was being an idiot.

He kissed me, and a part of me was scared I'd feel something like I did four years ago, but I didn't feel anything but confused and guilty.

He left quietly, and I started to panic.

What was I supposed to say to Owen?

A/N- You all thought Burke was over his Christina fetish. Hehe.

Wouldn't be based on greys anatomy if It wasnt dramatic.

Thanks for reading!

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~Daisy