Falling For A Beckham || Brooklyn Beckham

Smiling With Him

Guys, you wouldn't believe what I just did today
If I could, I'd go back in time and stop what happened between Brooklyn and I breaking up. It was a stupid reason, but we agreed. I was so stupid to let him go and he was stupid to let me go. Seeing him smiling with Chloë and having a great time makes me smile. I just wanted Brooklyn to be happy, even if the reason why he was happy wasn't because of me.

Brooklyn and I, like most people in "love", had our ups and downs but they were never seen to anyone but us. I love him and will forever, but we have to grow up before we light that flame. I need to be ready for this. Brooklyn loves his current girlfriend, but I really do hope that there's still hope for us.

Crushing on a Beckham is difficult, to say the least, but so is loving him. Every time you leave your house, there're people following you with cameras asking you questions about what goes on in your private life and you just want to get away from it all.

You might think I just absolutely love being in the spotlight, but I hate it. I've never liked being the center of attention and I don't like the idea of me being on a ton of magazines because of who I'm dating or who I'm friends with. Society sucks and I guess my point in this stupid rant of mine is that I love Brooklyn. Plus smiling with him is the most amazing thing you'll ever do.

He needs a friend and that's what I'll be until we're both ready to continue what we had. Maybe that's why I'm in his room playing FIFA...

"What're you doing tonight?" Brooklyn asks me as he passes the football to his teammate.

"I don't know, I might go and hang out with some friends or I could always stay at home and watch Orange is the New Black." I say but think I'll go with the first option.

"What friends?" He asks me, pausing the game to get a drink from his water and to look at me.

"Jack Johnson and his friends." I reply and take a drink from my water as well.

We get back to the game before we finish with him winning. We take a break but I tell him that I should get going. He walks me outside before I get into the car and drive to where Jack currently is.