Keeping You

Forty

Edit is mine :)

"Opal!! I know you're in there!!" He pounded on the door.

He's been at it for almost an hour. Just shouting. Luckily most of the people on the floor were at some frat party and he wasn't disturbing anyone but us. The constant yelling was hurting my head and I couldn't take it anymore. I whipped open the door and even though Sara told me not to.

"Fucking stop it Niall!"

"No. I love you!" He tried to pull my face to kiss me but I pushed his chest.

"Bullshit."

"I do. Damn it Opal. I want to marry you. I'm just stupid."

"You've got that right." I crossed my arms I've my chest.

"Did you hear me? I said I want to marry you." He looked down at the floor, stepping towards me.

"Yeah I heard you, but it's too late now isn't it? You don't tell someone you love them or want to marry them and then think it is okay to cheat on them." He looked up. "You broke your promise. You said things wouldn't be so bad for me anymore, but you lied. You are what's bad for me now. Tomorrow I'm going back to New York. My modeling is really picking up. I might not even be going to school anymore. I can buy myself and my mom an apartment there. Once the semester is over, I'll be a full time model. I'll be doing fashion shows in fashion week. That's what's good for me. Never seeing you again will be good for me." He leaned against the wall behind him, sliding down to the floor. "I'll be fine without you. I don't need you."

"I need you." He choked.

"You don't need me, you've got Felicity." I bent down in front of him. "Have fun seeing my face everywhere. I hope it reminds you of how horrible this was of you." I stood up and kicked his foot before turning and going back into Sara's dorm room.

"You're really never going back home?" She asked.

"I wasn't sure about it until now, but yeah that place isn't my home anymore. New York is. I'm successful there and Victoria's Secret wants me as one of their Angels. I wasn't sure if I should take the job but now I am." I sat down on her bed as she sat in the desk chair. "I was going to see what Niall thought about it this weekend. I was going to see if he would live with me over the summer there." I frowned looking down at my hands. "I'm alone again."

Sara stood from her chair. "I'm here for you."

"You have Liam and Vera has Harry and Ruby has Levi. I have no one. I know you're here for me, but I mean I have no one that is, mine." She hugged my shoulders.

"If I wasn't going to live with Liam, I'd move in with you in a heartbeat." I weakly smiled, knowing she was trying to help. "Maybe you can date one of those hot guy models."

I laughed a bit. "They are hot but trust me they are tools."

Sara and I tried to talk about anything that would keep my mind off Niall. Which was difficult considering I am who I am and I am where I am because of him. He's the reason I'm no longer working at the hardware store or living on the streets. Now I live in an amazing apartment working for some of the biggest fashion agents. I owe him my life. Well, I did until he betrayed me. I knew some things I said were harsh but they were true.

I knew I would see Niall again. We have the same friends. Again, because of him.

I would most likely see him several times if I stay friends with Sara, I assume I will since she's my best friend, and if he stays friends with Liam. I don't see them not being friends. I'm sort of stuck with him in my life.

I laid down in her bed and turned on my phone to make sure no one else tried to get a hold of me. My phone blew up with missed calls. Over a hundred from him. I also received several texts.

*im sorry*

*please don't break up with me*

*opal what am I supposed to do without you?*

*i need you*

*i fucked up*

*i didn't mean to cheat on you. I don't know why I did it.*

*i love you.*

The last one. It must have been after we just talked.

*Ignore all my other texts. I get we're over. It's all my fault. I fucked a girl when I already had the most amazing girl to call mine. I'll see you around I guess. I won't push anything. No matter how much I want to get you back I know I can't have you. I can't keep you.*

I sighed and set my phone on her desk. "This is going to be hard."

"I know it will be." Sara sympathized.

"Sara. I love him." A tear slipped across my temple and into my hair as I laid on my back.

"Sadly Hun, you'll always love him. He's your first love." She stood up and sat on her bed.

I sat up and hugged her. "I don't want to break up with him. I'm furious with him, but I want him."

"You two need to stay away from each other. He cheated on you Opal!" She said trying to knock some sense into me.

"I know we do, but would it be so wrong if I forgave him eventually? What would you do if Liam cheated on you?" I asked. "I mean I know he never would because you two have been together forever but what if he did? Would you give him a second chance?"

She thought for a while, staring across the room. "Yeah I would."

"Then would be so bad if I forgave him?"

"No I guess not." She looked at me. "Just promise you'll try to do your own thing. Don't just go running back to him."

"I won't."

I would try at least. I changed my clothes and Sara let me sleep in her bed. She slept in her roommate’s bed who was staying with her boyfriend for the weekend. I laid in the bed and thought about how Niall was down the hall, probably lying awake too.

I looked over at Sara to make sure she was sleeping before I picked up my phone to send a text.

*meet me in the hall*

I slowly tiptoed out of the bed and crept to the door, opening it without a creak. I slid down against the wall, waiting for him. I played with my fingers as I heard the door down the hall open. He walked over to me in his sweats and a T-shirt. He sat down beside me.

We sat in silence for a while until I rested my head on his shoulder. "You really messed up."

"I know."

"I don't know why I can't just stay mad at you though." I sighed. "I love you. Right now I hate that I love you." I picked my head up. "I think we should be friends. We should for our friends' sake." He nodded. "And mine."

He looked into my eyes. "I'll take all I can get. I love you too, Opal. I really do, I don't know why I did it. Just you willing to be my friend, means the world to me." He turned his head and looked at his feet.

I moved my body to hug my arms around him. "I'm going to miss you."

"I already miss you." He frowned. "Can I kiss you? Just one last time?"

I nodded and closed my eyes. I felt his hands rest on my neck as his thumb rubbed my cheeks. I fluttered my eyes open to see what was taking him so long. His eyes flicked to my lips and back up to meet mine. He was taking it all in, not wanting to lose the moment. Much to my dismay I felt the same way. He leaned in and I shut my eyes again. His lips lightly grazed mine, before he pressed them harder. I kissed back, inhaling his scent one last time. My heart cracked when he pulled away.

"I'm sorry Opal." He sat back. "Let me tell your mom alright. I need to own up to what I did." He gulped and looked up at me.

I nodded, pushing myself up. "I'll see you, I guess."

He stood as well. "Bye Opal."

I stuck out my hand for him to shake. "Bye Niall."