Dear Agony

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"I will find the enemy within, 'cause I can feel it crawl beneath my skin."

I woke up relatively early the next morning, not that I slept much to begin with. I couldn't stop thinking; about Sophia, about Daryl, all the shit I said. Could I have handled it better? Fuck yes. But I couldn't keep playing around like all that time by myself without him making an effort hasn't hurt me. In fact, it's killed me immensely. I was about to head off to go look for Sophia. Dale was climbing down from the roof of the RV so Andrea could take her shift for watch. 

"Belle," he called to me with a small gesture that I go over to him. I walked to meet the man. "You wanna tell me what all that was about?" he asked. 

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What?" 

"Don't give me that shit. Why all the sour faces between you and that redneck boy?" 

Oh. That. Yeah, that...that was a tough one. I remained silent for a moment. 

"Don't think I didn't see it," he added. 

I sighed, mumbling out a small, "It's nothing." 

"Didn't look like nothing." Again, I didn't answer right away. I didn't really want to bring it up any more than it needed to. "Look," Dale said, "I'm only asking because I want to keep this group together as much as the next guy. I don't need any other people trying to kill each other." 

I nodded. "It was early life stuff. Y'know, pre...this." I told him. 

"You wanna talk about it?" Dale asked. 

I smiled at the offer but politely declined. "Nah. Don't really want to bring it up again." 

He placed a hand on my shoulder. "Well, you're gonna need to eventually. And when you're ready, there's a whole bunch of people here who I'm sure would listen." 

I smiled again, thanking Dale for being so thoughtful. He gave my shoulder a small pat before sauntering off.

I went to grab my gun and hunting knife before, once again, making my way to the forest to search for Sophia. 

"Belle," Shane, this time, called to me. 

I stopped, clenching my fists in anger and closing my eyes before turning around. "What?" I asked, the smallest things setting me on edge. 

"Where you going?" he asked. 

"Why do you care? Last I remember was that I was a pain in your ass who only caused problems and didn't have anything nice to say so I shouldn't say anything at all." 

Shane looked down with a bit of what looked like regret in his expression. "Look, I'm sorry. I know that doesn't make up for the shit I did but I am. And as much as I hate to admit it, that bitchy little mouth of yours is actually keeping us together." 

More apologies, my favorite. I sighed. "Well, thanks. And since you so nicely asked, I'm going to look for Sophia. Now I gotta go, Daryl'll be up soon and I don't want him knowing where I am." I turned, beginning to make my departure from the group for the day. 

"Why?" Shane asked. 

"None of your business," I said over my shoulder.

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