Trespassing (Daryl Dixon x OC)

Savior Complex

"All the skeletons you hide, show me yours and I'll show you mine."

I don't know why this shocked me so much. Honestly, it didn't. It made perfect sense. I've let my mind be clouded by fairness for too long. I should have drawn the line when he took out Abraham.

Oh, Abraham.

Ever since I left Negan in his office, I've heard nothing but the cracks of Abraham's skull. It was loud, ramming itself into my eardrums so that I'd never forget that moment. Hit after hit after hit. Starting hard and vicious only to end mushy and bloody. I still remember the way his body jolted with each hit. I still remember the way his hand lost its grip on mine.

As these thoughts replayed so vividly, I swore I could feel the way his blood splattered on me. My arms grew numb all over the areas his remnants stained. That was all I had left of Abraham.

My stomach churned as the memories played out further. That first swing at Glenn's head had me holding my breath. It was like he moved in slow motion as he sat up. The wind got knocked out of me as visions of his mangled face clouded my eyes.

That deadly dent in his skull. Thick, hot blood seeping aggressively down his skin. One eye threatening to pop fully out of his eye socket. I still remember how he choked and gagged on his blood, muttering out his last words to the love of his life.

The thoughts became too much for my stomach to bear. Sprinting into the bathroom, I nearly threw myself to the ground. My knees buckled as my insides caved. I heaved and heaved but nothing came out. Thick gobs of spit fell from my open mouth, preparing for an outcome that never showed. I had no food to throw up. Only minimal amounts of stomach acid that mixed with my saliva. The burn at the back of my throat remained all the same.

This went on for minutes. I'd pause, my stomach would convulse for a few moments before ultimately stopping my breath to heave some more. I was disgusting. Saliva dribbled down my chin, tears from the pain adorned my face, my head and body pounded at the actions.

Eventually, this all passed, as most things do. I laid on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, collecting myself. I took deep breaths to calm myself, wiping the spit from my chin.

My hand paused as Negan's hand was stuck out beside me. I followed it up his arm, meeting his gaze down at me. He looked rather remorseful. I couldn't have given less of a shit.

I smacked his hand out of the way before pulling myself to my feet. I pushed past him, making my way back to the bed. Just a few more hours before this is all over. I don't know how I'm gonna talk to Rick about this, but for now, I need to stay present.

Negan sighed through his nose, leaning against the doorframe for a moment. He took a few steps closer to the bed before muttering, "Dwight's gonna take you home tomorrow. Don't be late."

***

I never saw Negan again before I left the Sanctuary. Someone else came to get me and Dwight was taking me back. This was fine by me. I didn't know what I would do if I had to be in a car alone with him.

"So," Dwight began, "what's the plan? How are we stopping Negan?"

I sighed, "I don't know. I've been a little preoccupied."

"Right, sorry."

We were quiet for a moment before I asked, "Why do you want to take him down?"

Dwight's jaw clenched at my question.

"He took my wife." That was all he said.

"Is that how you got your--?" I pushed further, pointing to my cheek. He glanced over and understood what I was asking. He sighed.