Pidge: Ah, crap. We're in some deep shit now.
Shiro: First of all- Language
Shiro: Second of all- We're totally fucked
Matt: Hey. Hey, Lance.
Lance: What's up?
Matt: Snarkon.
Keith: Matt, do you know why Lance is laughing so hard?
Matt: Hmm. No idea. Ask him about Snarkon, though.
Pidge: Do you think the ocean is salty because the land never waves back?
Matt: You raise a good point
Allura: I want to give Lotor a high-five... in the face... with a brick covered in poison and spikes
Lance: He can go swimming in acid with a straight jacket.
Allura: He can choke on his own puke.
Lance: He can go step on a lego.
Allura: LAnce!!! That's just so cruel!!! How could you think such things!?
Lance: What can I say? I'm a bad bitch.
Lance: Keith, I just found out I have SDF
Keith: What's that?
Lance: Synchronous Diaphragmatic Flutter.
Keith: Which is?
Lance: Hiccups.
Keith: Hold your breath for a really long time and jump out a window they'll go away plus the fall from the window will scare you as much as I juST GOT DON'T DO THAT TO ME
Pidge: Dude, send me a joke.
Matt: I can't, I'm hanging out with my boyfriend.
Pidge: HA! Good one. Send another.
Matt:
Matt: Did I fucking stutter
Pidge: What the shit you're dating Shiro???
Matt: Hell yeah I am
Pidge: Does he know you two are dating?
Matt: ...
Matt: Well, not exactly.
Lance: I bet I can get you to say the color red
Hunk: Okay.
Lance: What color is the sky back on earth?
Hunk: Blue.
Lance: HA! I told you I could get you to say blue.
Hunk: What? No, you said red.
Lance: HA
Matt: Hey, Shiro. Do you think we're having updog for dinner?
Shiro: Updog?
Matt: Yeah, updog.
Shiro: What's updog?
Matt: Not much, what's up with you!?!?!?
Lance: Keith, finish the sentence.
Lance: I ____ you
Keith: Hate?
Lance: No
Keith: Kick?
Lance: No, sweetie.
Lance: I'll give you a hint- it starts with 'L'
Keith: Lick?
Lance: I mean, I consent to it lay it on me
Keith: Was that the answer?
Lance: No.
Keith: Love?
Lance: Yes!
Lance: Now, what's the whole sentence?
Keith: I love you
Lance: Aw, I love you too!!!
Keith: You adorable nut
YOU ARE READING
Klance oneshots
FanfictionHey. This is a bunch of Klance oneshots because why not? I mean, they're adorable! They're practically canon! So yeah. Yay. Edit: okay so fair warning!!! These are (unsurprisingly) unedited and the first few stories are a little bit cringy, but that...