She requested I write what she said as Allura
Also, can we please appreciate the show Galavant for a few minutes?
Shiro: So, this is what I plan to do if I win the lottery...
Shiro: *elaborate plan*
Allura: I'm not going to play the lottery because I don't have any dreams.
Shiro: That's... that's the saddest thing I've ever heard.
****
Allura: Ugh, this table is fIltHy.
Allura: *sprays table with febreeze*
Allura: wait
****
Allura: Ooh! Jonny rockets! I used to go there all the time!
Coran (or crayon as my sister calls him): Oh, yeah! I went there once.
Allura: Wasn't the food there awesome!?
Coran: I don't know, I mean... I just don't think the wait was worth it.
Allura: ...
Allura: *weakly* what?
Coran: Hm?
Allura: I wasn't fat I WaS PrEgnAnT
Coran: I MEANT THE LINE WAS TOO LONG
****
Hunk: Ugh, Allura! Just move the gate out of the way, it makes getting to the next room easier!
Allura: *Walks over gate instead of moving it*
Hunk: Of course, I'm a hypocrite so why listen to me?
Allura: *nonchalantly* Yeah, you hippo.
Hunk: What?
Allura: OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY I JUST MEANT TO SHORTEN THE WORD 'HYPOCRITE'
****
Allura: Okay, so, two days after my due date, I was walking around the chocolate store grabbing handfuls of chocolate and then when the women said 'ohh when are you due' and I started crying and sobbed out 'TWO DAYS AGO'
****
Allura: *walks around the mall on Halloween while she was nine months pregnant and watching all the kids trick or treating*
Allura: *cries* THIS ISN'T FAIR I JUST WANT SOME CANDY.
Allura: *points to a random kid* YOU'RE NOT EVEN WEARING A COSTUME!
****
Allura: *Fumbles with the keys while trying to start the car*
Allura: *drops keys* Ah, Jesus fuck me.
Lance: I mean... if that's what you're into, I guess.
Allura: *laughing*
****
Allura: *walks into a Christmas store*
Allura: *looks around*
Allura: This reminds me of Christmas.
****
Allura: *calls child by different middle name*
Keith: Uh... Allura? That's not your child's middle name.
Allura: *angrily* what are you talking about?
Keith: That's my middle name.
Allura: Are you sure?
****
Allura: *bakes red potatoes instead of baking potatoes*
Pidge: Allura, what is this?
Allura: Um, this is obviously a tray full of baked potatoes.
Pidge: These are not proper baking potatoes.
Allura: What are you talking about? Are not all potatoes the same?
Pidge: No.
Allura: *voice crack* what
****
Allura: *trying to explain a thing to Hunk* And... what's next?
Lance: *explains the thing while Hunk is in the room*
Allura: Right, so, like it's like *starts explaining the thing again*
Lance: Y'know, just in case you didn't get it the first time.
Allura: *sass meter to the max* 'Kay.
****
Allura and Shiro: *eating ice-cream sundaes*
~next morning~
Pidge: Oh! I forgot last night we could have ice-cream sundaes!
Shiro: What are you talking about? You had one last night.
Pidge: What? No, I didn't.
Shiro: You didn't?
Pidge: Can I have one now?
Allura: *from the other room* we don't have anymore.
Pidge: *sadly* what?
YOU ARE READING
Klance oneshots
FanfictionHey. This is a bunch of Klance oneshots because why not? I mean, they're adorable! They're practically canon! So yeah. Yay. Edit: okay so fair warning!!! These are (unsurprisingly) unedited and the first few stories are a little bit cringy, but that...
