YouTube One-Shots (Book 3)

Unrequited Soulmates

Note: I'm in a BBS discord group chat, and we were talking about angst fics, and I said I could write some, so here's one of them. I hope you enjoy!

Pairing: Krii7y

Every night, John would see the boy of his dreams, his soulmate.

He had black hair that was always hidden by a equally black hat, but whenever he took it off, John wanted to run his fingers through his hair. He had chocolate colored eyes, ones that were always warm and loving. He always wore comfortable looking clothes that always looked cute on him.

And every night, he'd look at this boy, and then he'd walk towards him. The boy always smiled a smile that made John's heart beat faster and made his cheeks turn red and made his breathing stop for a second.

He was so nervous around this boy. He was afraid that once he got to him, he'd lose him forever. It was a silly fear, but one that sent shivers down his spine and made him shake and sweat in nervousness. This boy was the only one that made him feel this way, the only one to make him feel scared and excited at the same time.

The boy sometimes laughed, and when he did, John would practically melt. He would pray that the boy would laugh again, as it was practically music to his ears.

The boy sometimes held his hand out, and sometimes he waved him over. John's feet would be stuck to the ground for a second, scared that he would do something wrong and fuck it up. But the boy would repeat the action, and suddenly John's feet would move without his consent. He sometimes walked slowly, he sometimes jogged, or even ran to the boy.

The boy would wrap his arms around him, and John would do the same. The boy sometimes giggled, which brought a warm feeling to John's stomach. He'd lean in, and...

He'd wake up.

He'd wake up with full memory of the boy and what had happened in those wonderful dreams that was only a fantasy. Well, only partially a fantasy. He knew that the boy existed. How? Because they were soulmates. One soulmate was known to remember his dreams, although the other soulmate was not. The other soulmate didn't remember anything. They only remembered in their dreams. That fact broke John's heart, but he had to keep his hopes one.

One day, maybe one day, he would find the boy. Maybe he'd finally learn the boy's name, or what his favorite food was, or anything about him at all.

But for now, he was stuck in a lonely place with no one there to tell him how much they loved him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

John usually spent most of his days inside, playing video games. But during winter, he liked to be outside, walking around in the snow. He liked winter. He didn't know why, but he always had a good feeling about the season. Like something good was going to happen.

Usually nothing out of the ordinary happened, but he still had hope. Maybe I'll find my soulmate, he'd think occasionally. He knew it was a long shot, but his gut had to be right one of these days, right?

Today, he felt extra good. He didn't know why. Maybe I got a little more sleep than I normally do, he thought. Or maybe I'll meet my soulmate today. Maybe I'll get lucky and see him on the street, and maybe we'll fall in love. Maybe today's the day that I become not lonely and sad, but happy and with some company.

The thought of meeting his soulmate made him quicken his speed of getting ready and out the door. If his gut was right for once, he'd flip his shit (in secret, of course. There's no sense in freaking out in front of your soulmate - that's just something you're not supposed to do).

Once he got into town, he relaxed a little, although his heart had begun to beat faster. God, he felt so good today, something great must happen.

And then he saw him.

Everything turned to slow motion in that moment, and John felt like he was in one of those cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies. His cheeks became redder than they already were, his thoughts stopped, and he was frozen to his spot. His breath was shaky, and his chest was tightening.

Here he was, standing nine feet away from the love of his life, and he had no idea of what to say or do. His thoughts were mostly jumbled, but one thought popped up from the rest: Fuck.

Well that's no help, he then thought as he frowned to himself.

He shook all thoughts away when he heard the boy laugh. Fuck, it sounds prettier in person.

John wished so hard that the laugh was for him. He didn't even care if it was because of a weird look on his face, or if it was because of his outfit. He wanted that laugh to be for him. But when he looked, he saw that it wasn't for him. It was for someone else. Someone else who was holding his hand.

The boy John had grown to love in his dreams was holding another man's hand, laughing at something he had said. The other man was grinning at the boy, and then leaned down. He had just kissed John's soulmate. And his soulmate looked so happy, and had kissed back.

John felt heartbroken, scared, and angry all at the same time. He was on the verge of a mental breakdown. He squeezed his eyes shut and told him that it was a nightmare. He counted to ten, breathed, and then opened his eyes, hoping that they were gone.

But they weren't.

They were still there, and they were still happy.

Suddenly John felt hot tears begin to run down his face. They burned down his face, and he wiped them away, but they kept coming. This is when he decided to turn away and run. He pushed past people, breathing heavily, now letting sobs out every once in a while as he ran.

When he made it to his house, he ran into his room and immediately collapsed on the bed, sobbing.

This isn't what he wanted. This isn't what he wanted at all.

He first felt angry. Angry at the guy who was with his soulmate, angry at himself for not doing anything to stop him. He clenched his hands into fists and hit himself. God, he was such a fucking idiot.

Then he felt sorrow. The hits slowed to a stop, and the tears were now making puddles in the sheets. His soulmate looked so happy with that guy. That guy was probably so much better than him. John probably couldn't stand a chance against him. His hands unclenched, and he put his face in them.

There was no way in hell that he would gain the courage to step up and say something, he knew that. And if he did, what was he supposed to say? Hey, I'm your soulmate, so step the fuck away from this guy over here and kiss me.

John almost felt betrayed. By himself, and by his soulmate. Himself because his gut told him that that was supposed to be a good day, not a completely heart-wrenching day that made him want to kill himself.

His soulmate because he had to know that that other guy wasn't his soulmate. It wasn't possible for two soulmates to not remember each other, and if the guy did know his soulmate, then he would have known that it wasn't him. So why were they together? He wanted to know so badly, but he didn't want to interfere. God, it was a stupid reason, and he knew it, but that was just his shy nature. He couldn't bring himself to say something if he tried.

So at the end of the day John was alone, angry, hurt, and sad. This was not what he wanted. He wanted nice day, but of course the world had to fuck him over. Maybe in a different life, John thought as he drifted off to sleep. He hoped he could maybe go into a coma and stay there forever.

That way, he could always be with his soulmate.